Silk Road forums

Market => Product requests => Topic started by: moonbear on December 24, 2011, 05:43 am

Title: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 24, 2011, 05:43 am
I heard you can get high off inhaling poop air. Does this actually work? If so is there anyway to make it not taste awful?

EDIT: Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jackstraw on December 24, 2011, 05:47 am
I'm sure you can find a free sample somewhere moonbear.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 24, 2011, 05:56 am
I'm sure you can find a free sample somewhere moonbear.
Yeah, if anyone doesn't mind preparing some sterile jenkem for me I'd be happy to review your poop-air
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: 16384 on December 24, 2011, 08:23 am
If you can afford a computer then you shouldn't be smoking jenkem.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: onlythebest on December 24, 2011, 09:23 am
LOL
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: ExtraSheets on December 24, 2011, 10:05 am
Didn't this end up being a hoax?
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: Aliahad on December 24, 2011, 04:23 pm
Jenk 'eeryday
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: MagicMan on December 24, 2011, 06:23 pm
Jenkem was invented to assist natural selection, as such, if you believe it works then please try it!
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 24, 2011, 08:37 pm
Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: Aliahad on December 25, 2011, 01:01 am
You... you seriously did it? I thought Jenkem was a huge joke, I thought everyone talking about jenkem knew it was a huge joke...
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 25, 2011, 01:25 am
You... you seriously did it? I thought Jenkem was a huge joke, I thought everyone talking about jenkem knew it was a huge joke...
Desperate times call for desperate measures, sir. I had to find a way to get high... unfortunately, it only made me really, really, REALLY sick. It ruined Christmas eve. My dad called a psychiatrist and I have to meet with him on the 5th. Worst drug ever...
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jorg on December 25, 2011, 02:17 am
Nahhh... you are joking aren't you ?
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 25, 2011, 02:22 am
What do you think?
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: MagicMan on December 25, 2011, 02:47 am
There are some stupid people on SR, but I doubt anyone that can figure out tor, pgp, and bitcoin would be stupid enough to inhale their own shit, so tl:dr, yes, he's very likely joking
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 25, 2011, 05:52 am
There are some stupid people on SR, but I doubt anyone that can figure out tor, pgp, and bitcoin would be stupid enough to inhale their own shit, so tl:dr, yes, he's very likely joking
Do you think if someone did do that, would they be certifiably retarded?
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: towelie on December 25, 2011, 06:03 am
Moonbear, you are supposed to let it ferment for a week or so.
Just think of it as making Kimchee or sauerkraut, but from poop. :D
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 25, 2011, 06:39 am
Okay, I must try it again!  Maybe if it ferments it will be better!  ::)
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: johnnyfried123 on December 25, 2011, 06:49 am
You didn't do it moonbear, nobody is that fucking stupid.

If you really did, I have definitely lost all (little) remaining faith in our species.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jorg on December 25, 2011, 01:11 pm
Ok, sorry you where quite convincing ...

I don't know... when i see all the shit that can happen on this planet, I'm not surprised at all if a person could be stupid enough to try this ...
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 25, 2011, 03:06 pm
You didn't do it moonbear, nobody is that fucking stupid.

If you really did, I have definitely lost all (little) remaining faith in our species.
Screw you, that was funny and your ruining it.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: johnnyfried123 on December 25, 2011, 04:39 pm
You didn't do it moonbear, nobody is that fucking stupid.

If you really did, I have definitely lost all (little) remaining faith in our species.
Screw you, that was funny and your ruining it.

Sorry dawg, you just can't tell anymore. The stupids are taking over...

Jenk in peace
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jorg on December 25, 2011, 08:39 pm
EDIT : Oups useless post
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: PumpkinYeti on December 26, 2011, 06:42 am
I think he was serious in the original post...

Then somewhere decided to do some research and learned the joke.

I can sense the fierce backpedaling is all I'm sayin...
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: MagicMan on December 26, 2011, 09:18 pm
I maintain that no one on SR is that stupid
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: bolovide on December 26, 2011, 09:48 pm
People on 420chan swear up & down that jenkem is legit.  I feel the need of huffing shit to get high is ridiculous.  I feel bad enough smoking resin bowls xD
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 27, 2011, 07:41 pm
People on 420chan swear up & down that jenkem is legit.  I feel the need of huffing shit to get high is ridiculous.  I feel bad enough smoking resin bowls xD
I don't really like resin either, but it's an economical way to get high. Yes this thread was a joke, but I was hoping it would make a few people laugh. I don't think very many people would try jenkem even if it did work. I mean, if your that desperate why not just go huff gas or do air duster?
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jorg on December 28, 2011, 12:11 am
It made me laugh don't worry ... I laughed in first place about you because I believed in your story and told myself "shit ! People actually do stuff like this even here !".

But now it still makes me laugh in a different way when I imagine the scene according to your profile picture lol

Little mustache man shitting in a bottle, breathing poop air and then vomiting with his bottle of shit laying around ! haha
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 28, 2011, 12:40 am
It made me laugh don't worry ... I laughed in first place about you because I believed in your story and told myself "shit ! People actually do stuff like this even here !".

But now it still makes me laugh in a different way when I imagine the scene according to your profile picture lol

Little mustache man shitting in a bottle, breathing poop air and then vomiting with his bottle of shit laying around ! haha
I'm glad I made you laugh! That's not a picture of me, but thought it would make people laugh :)
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: SpaceChimp on December 28, 2011, 04:55 am
Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.

This post is full of win. The image in my head was perfect, well done Sir.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: theamnesiac on December 28, 2011, 05:47 am
Trolls.  JENK IS HREEAAALLLL
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: onlythebest on December 28, 2011, 07:46 am
LOL wtf
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on December 28, 2011, 10:12 am
Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.

This post is full of win. The image in my head was perfect, well done Sir.
Thank you. Thats the exact reason I wrote it1 :)
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: tordemon on January 14, 2012, 08:15 pm
This is quite possibly the best thread on the silk road forums.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on January 14, 2012, 11:27 pm
This is quite possibly the best thread on the silk road forums.
Really? Thanks! I'm flattered actually. I'm really glad I was able to give some people on here a nice laugh!
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jewfro on January 17, 2012, 02:26 am
omfgLOL. i laughed so hard i nearly cried.

but in all serious: i can totally see starving african kids doing this :/
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on January 17, 2012, 01:43 pm
omfgLOL. i laughed so hard i nearly cried.

but in all serious: i can totally see starving african kids doing this :/
I don't think anyone would actually try jenkem. except perhaps as a torture method.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: Dankalicious on January 17, 2012, 04:21 pm
You guys are hilarious.  Look up "trolling" and this topic becomes a prime example of it. 

Jenkem was a troll in itself.  It never existed, people never did it.  The pictures are faked. 
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: doublemint on January 17, 2012, 09:11 pm
This has to be one of the best threads on SR. Props to OP
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on February 03, 2012, 06:39 pm
I decided to try jenkem again, but this time using a different method.
I dropped a sticky nug into my pipe and lit it up. It began to sizzle as I smelled it - the rank smell of burning shit. I inhaled it and instantly felt the effects of jenkem - the 5 second super euphoria I always wanted! Too bad it left my bowl smelling like shit, since then none of my friends will smoke out of my bowl. OH well.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jewfro on February 03, 2012, 08:54 pm
I decided to try jenkem again, but this time using a different method.
I dropped a sticky nug into my pipe and lit it up. It began to sizzle as I smelled it - the rank smell of burning shit. I inhaled it and instantly felt the effects of jenkem - the 5 second super euphoria I always wanted! Too bad it left my bowl smelling like shit, since then none of my friends will smoke out of my bowl. OH well.

then they can try the wonders of jenkem!
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: Dr Special K on February 03, 2012, 09:55 pm
LMAO. You fucking Shit head.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: Dr Special K on February 03, 2012, 10:04 pm
Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.

lmao you need some hardcore help
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jimvisa on February 04, 2012, 12:39 am
i'm normally way too constipated to produce good jenk... like i can try to dissolve it in innocuous liquids but it really is fucking bricklike, just a total pain in the ass (literally  ;D )

my rice milk and meth binges produce some great jenk, so good i'd consider selling it if i had a way to make it more than once in a blue moon
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: germanicus on February 09, 2012, 09:40 am
Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.

You never thought you would have to wallow in your own puke next to a bottle of your own excrement.

Jenkem will change that.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: SpanishFly on February 09, 2012, 04:43 pm
moonbear, your jenkin story is soooooo funny, I had to read it twice,

you should do it, film it and post on youtube
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: moonbear on February 27, 2012, 03:40 am
moonbear, your jenkin story is soooooo funny, I had to read it twice,

you should do it, film it and post on youtube
IM GONA DO IT!
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: jmoney113 on February 27, 2012, 05:37 am
If you need some quality Jenkem, I have a Chipotle right by my house and can ingest disgusting amounts of Mt Dew for some dank jenkem. That shit will hit you HARD, literally.
Title: Re: Jenkem
Post by: dipmyfry on February 27, 2012, 06:36 am
I heard you can get high off inhaling poop air. Does this actually work? If so is there anyway to make it not taste awful?

EDIT: Okay, I got tired of waiting and tried making some jenkem.
I stuffed poop into a plasitc 2-liter and put a balloon on top. When I woke up the next morning, I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the balloon. I couldn't wait! Finally the time was upon me- the inner self-reflective trip jenkem had to offer was about to begin. I held the balloon up to my mouth, and breathed in generously. I got a strange head rush, like an oxygen-deprivation head rush. I breathed out, and instantly had the urge to ralf.
I ran to the bathroom as soon as possible, but I was too late. The seemingly endless spray of barfaroni began splattering all over the carpet and myself, and it smelled so bad I couldn't help but barf until there was nothing left in my stomach. My mom ran out of bed, screaming at me. She threatened to call the police if I didn't explain myself. I did, and she responded by saying, "You are RETARDED!" She returned some of my christmas gifts to the store, including a chemistry set I really wanted. I cried as my brothers saw me wallowing in my own puke next to a 2-liter full of my feces. How pitiful I must have looked.
The moral of my story: DO NOT TRY JENKEM.

Hahah i see your interest for JENKEM GREW EHH