Silk Road forums

Discussion => Shipping => Topic started by: masterblaster on April 05, 2013, 08:49 pm

Title: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: masterblaster on April 05, 2013, 08:49 pm
Its the endangered Margay, i got a buyer but he doesnt know if it will get though customs, should i seal it in one layer of plastic or two? Im going to give it some food and water and a can of air.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: wasta on April 06, 2013, 02:35 am
You can't put a animal just like that in a box on the mail.
The cat will scream.
It can get really cold in the the belly of a plain.

The only just and right way is to look for a import export specialist that has made it's business from transporting animals over the world.

Think twice !

Be wise !
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: mclovinfakes on April 06, 2013, 03:47 am
That seems so cruel...

"seal it in one layer of plastic or two? Im going to give it some food and water and a can of air. "

How do you even give it a can of air?

It may also growl and try getting out of its cage because it's going to be hungry / cold.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: slysamuel0109 on April 06, 2013, 04:06 am
What the fuck is wrong with you?

Someone needs to seal you up a couple times, shove you in a box, and ship your ass off to some piece of shit in North Korea that will keep you locked up in a steel cage the rest of your life.

It's cool though. We'll throw in a can of oxygen and pray that customs doesn't find you..
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: fordingtheharrison on April 06, 2013, 04:36 am
You don't even need to do any of those fancy things. Stuffing it into a large enough envelope should suffice. I mean, it's no problem if there's no food, the shipping time shouldn't be so long. Starvation builds character.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: LEFTY on April 06, 2013, 04:44 am
I understand this is a troll thread but I have always wondered why people feel the need to get exotic animals. Do you really need that Kinkajou so you can pretend your Paris Hilton?
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: aussiepp on April 06, 2013, 05:35 am
LOL

This is a joke, right?
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: sofish89 on April 06, 2013, 05:41 am
Hmm this reminds me of a thread that someone started that wanted to buy a human heart and then a mod got in trouble with DPR for saying that selling organs is against the rules which apparently is not against the rules? either way funny stuff on these forums..
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: sanrio on April 06, 2013, 07:38 pm
What the fuck is wrong with you?

Someone needs to seal you up a couple times, shove you in a box, and ship your ass off to some piece of shit in North Korea that will keep you locked up in a steel cage the rest of your life.

It's cool though. We'll throw in a can of oxygen and pray that customs doesn't find you..

LMAO
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: AllDayLong on April 06, 2013, 09:54 pm
I think the plastic will cause a suffocation hazard, and could let out the smell of feces. I bet if you just stick him in a MBB with some popcorn it will be all good.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: laplace on April 07, 2013, 02:28 am
I've shipped live gerbils a few times. I just lube 'em up and stuff 'em up my ass. They last for hours..

(Sorry about the above, I was laughing so hard I fell off my chair.)
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: lelmeriodici on April 07, 2013, 04:05 am
masterblaster, I thought you said you already figured out how to ship it!!!!! Come on man, I FEed a week ago and LIKE I TOLD YOU I need the thing for a rave next week!!!!  Just stuff it in an express envelope and get it in the mail, I don't mind if it's a little squished.



laplace......Jesus Christ.........never saw that one coming
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: boosties on April 07, 2013, 04:34 pm
Its the endangered Margay, i got a buyer but he doesnt know if it will get though customs, should i seal it in one layer of plastic or two? Im going to give it some food and water and a can of air.
WTF! jeezus! where do get these cans of air? do they sell them at the corner store?
i have to laugh everytime i read the op!!
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: Jack N Hoff on April 07, 2013, 04:51 pm
Its the endangered Margay, i got a buyer but he doesnt know if it will get though customs, should i seal it in one layer of plastic or two? Im going to give it some food and water and a can of air.
WTF! jeezus! where do get these cans of air? do they sell them at the corner store?
i have to laugh everytime i read the op!!
little scuba tanks mainly used for rodent scuba diving
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: dirtybiscuitzz718 on April 07, 2013, 05:01 pm
whats funny is every time this loser posts some nonsense to get a rise out of the forums, he gets it..
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: boosties on April 07, 2013, 05:16 pm
i know but the topic title has to make u laugh a little.....
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: Jack N Hoff on April 07, 2013, 06:05 pm
i know but the topic title has to make u laugh a little.....
at first i thought he was a little kid. then i saw this and the "douse your package in whiskey so it blends in" on the irish customs thread lol. then i clicked his name and read his first posts and realized hes not a kid or stupid, just a troll.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: AllDayLong on April 07, 2013, 06:56 pm
i know but the topic title has to make u laugh a little.....
at first i thought he was a little kid. then i saw this and the "douse your package in whiskey so it blends in" on the irish customs thread lol. then i clicked his name and read his first posts and realized hes not a kid or stupid, just a troll.

Eh, not sure why this would be trolling. He seems more like the class clown!
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: Jack N Hoff on April 07, 2013, 07:04 pm
i know but the topic title has to make u laugh a little.....
at first i thought he was a little kid. then i saw this and the "douse your package in whiskey so it blends in" on the irish customs thread lol. then i clicked his name and read his first posts and realized hes not a kid or stupid, just a troll.

Eh, not sure why this would be trolling. He seems more like the class clown!
class clowns are trolls too. remember they do it for the lulz.  my first 40 posts were trolling and asking about buying people so i can sympathize with some trolling.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: flakesmith on April 07, 2013, 07:36 pm
whats funny is every time this loser posts some nonsense to get a rise out of the forums, he gets it..

You'd think if people are smart enough to use SR, then they'd know not to fall for such obvious posts. But then again, the learning curve for the using the main site isn't too huge. People are still idiots.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: Immortally on April 07, 2013, 09:22 pm
What the fuck is wrong with you?

Someone needs to seal you up a couple times, shove you in a box, and ship your ass off to some piece of shit in North Korea that will keep you locked up in a steel cage the rest of your life.

It's cool though. We'll throw in a can of oxygen and pray that customs doesn't find you..

 ;D :D agree if this was serious post!! inhumane animals are precious..if you know people you love animals
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: yokes101 on April 08, 2013, 01:27 pm
That subject line made my day!  ;D
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: This Is Serious Mum on April 08, 2013, 04:50 pm



Undoubtedly the funniest threat I've read recently!

Brilliant
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: laplace on April 10, 2013, 01:33 am
Cmon where else can you learn to ship small furry creatures?
(Hell I subscribe to the Richard Gere(sp) method of gerbil packaging.)
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: 41910192618123 on April 10, 2013, 01:45 am
I'll take two once you get the shipping down.....
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: sofish89 on April 13, 2013, 11:33 pm
hello!! my animal FINALLY came in the mail today but it was dead! apparently he forgot to include the can of air.. Buyers beware
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: pkizenko98 on April 14, 2013, 11:53 am
You can only resist reading this post for so long.  I think I made it to two days then I just gave the fuck up.  Glad I did tho, definitely a good couple laughs from a good place deep in my soul.  I fuckin love you guys!
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: tolega on April 14, 2013, 03:07 pm
I have been thinking in opening a vendor account and start selling a few horses through SR. All pedigree. I will give discount on first 5 samples. Let me know if interested.
I triple-vacuum them with a bottle of oxygen and some grass.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: TheSauceIsHot on April 14, 2013, 03:18 pm
How do you suppose a can of air in a sealed bag works?   BOOM!
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: burgarsenator on April 14, 2013, 03:43 pm
What the fuck is wrong with you?

Someone needs to seal you up a couple times, shove you in a box, and ship your ass off to some piece of shit in North Korea that will keep you locked up in a steel cage the rest of your life.

It's cool though. We'll throw in a can of oxygen and pray that customs doesn't find you..

He forgot to put in WC. Poops lol
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: alagandar on April 15, 2013, 02:32 am
I dont care if this is fake i was laughing my fucking ass off reading that first page!!!Special props to laplace and his Richard Gere method!!!
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: laplace on April 15, 2013, 09:11 pm
I tried to double up on the shipping, you know - to save a little money, I rammed four of the little fuckers up there and HOLY FUCK MAN was there a scrap. I decided to check the area with a mirror and what the hell do you think I saw? A fucking snorkel! I guess the air ran out.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: sofish89 on April 16, 2013, 12:59 am
I tried to double up on the shipping, you know - to save a little money, I rammed four of the little fuckers up there and HOLY FUCK MAN was there a scrap. I decided to check the area with a mirror and what the hell do you think I saw? A fucking snorkel! I guess the air ran out.
you should of included an extra can of air :)
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: laplace on April 17, 2013, 12:37 am
I tried to double up on the shipping, you know - to save a little money, I rammed four of the little fuckers up there and HOLY FUCK MAN was there a scrap. I decided to check the area with a mirror and what the hell do you think I saw? A fucking snorkel! I guess the air ran out.
you should of included an extra can of air :)
It's surprising how much air the little fuckers use.

(Ok, I think we pretty much beat the fuck out of this one, I'm getting tired from laughing so hard.)
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: oldtoby on April 18, 2013, 01:41 am
The way to securely ship a small animal is inside a larger one, like a postal turducken.
Title: Re: I want to ship a small animall
Post by: DoktaLockeEyeQue on April 18, 2013, 11:04 am
How do you suppose a can of air in a sealed bag works?   BOOM!

That's compressed air.  Don't pressure it or make the sauce toooo hot;  It is not coated in cool ( that's cool-coated-compressed air).  No un-cool Boom, or "BOOM! (unhappy buyer) ***Is there an L, Pat? Say Jack!
;)

You can only resist reading this post for so long.  I think I made it to two days then I just gave the fuck up.  Glad I did tho, definitely a good couple laughs from a good place deep in my soul.  I fuckin love you guys!

Thanks! It'd be you to point this out to me, sir!  By the way, being smart:
I searched for the family, order, even Phylum :o for said species "Margay"
+++Genera-lly, it's extinct, in a "common sense", but rarely show's up in forums:  for people who say: 
*Damn smartass! I gotta buy a vowel first!    ***Pat I'll buy the "O", its there, Bet White Vanna shows me ;)
*Holdin me up PK, Vowels cost!+++  I fucking love these guy's too:
*NO PREMISE BY YOU SIR: BUT I UHFREAKINAGREE
Oh!!! I solved the 2 letter phrase?? :o What do I win?? A fortune or a wheel?
Let's go +"spinning"+ (define that word correctly, like ... in a CNN type newscaster way...)

You can't put a animal just like that in a box on the mail.
The cat will scream.
It can get really cold in the the belly of a plain.

The only just and right way is to look for a import export specialist that has made it's business from transporting animals over the world.

Think twice !

Be wise !

*PREMISE AGREED!!!! Inhumanity implemented to "logic":
 "Animal=Cat=Philosophical" intangible being= Travesty of Humor ... prob from "a" to "b"... :/
    and Such experts exist?? I have Another option to get rid of ... garbage?!??!.... like trash guys!!!

That seems so cruel...

"seal it in one layer of plastic or two? Im going to give it some food and water and a can of air. "

How do you even give it a can of air?

It may also growl and try getting out of its cage because it's going to be hungry / cold.

If you compress the air that is how!! Of course!!!  That air you are breathing is compressed all up by some Nitrogen!  Pick N2 Joke:
1) Scuba Diver: Dude you are bent (Nitrogen Narcosis) or
2) Dental Guy wants a high: Gotta wha?? Better gimme that Nihtruss!

**PREMISE: AGREED: A hungry, cold, airless (if you sent), and in two layers of protection at least......
         (Hey, have you tried that whistling Bob guy???  He left TV, always happy.  Bet what he says is true.
         I mean he is whistling happy.  And really can get those girls.  He is on SR now i think!! Google his,
         nvrmnd.....) 
   ......covered creature, that is wrong. Poor Leprechaun... I mean Margay  8)

What the fuck is wrong with you?

Someone needs to seal you up a couple times, shove you in a box, and ship your ass off to some piece of shit in North Korea that will keep you locked up in a steel cage the rest of your life.

It's cool though. We'll throw in a can of oxygen and pray that customs doesn't find you..

1) If he said anything Phylogenetically appropriate or fitting: ***PREMISE AGREED
2) I have kin in N. Korea.  Well, S. Korea.... same, eh?... ???
3) Seal a person 3x (added closed box), then ship to.... N. Korea?? (oh forgot they wana "Fox News Breaking Alert" us with a bomb) ...Weak! They are R-onery! So R-onery!  Russia would have been a colder choice...... Get it WarMonger?
4) Steel Cage Foheva? Foheva eva? EVA EVA?  Sounds like a crap situation.  Adding insult you ARE tossing a bomb to make a crap situation "BOOM-tastic" ... NOT cool! lol! There is a reason scuba divers flee lightning storms... BY GOING DEEPER!!!  A big lightning rod of a bomb of O2 sucks, prolly, not that I Scuba Dive.... Nitrox ;)  Dont worry customs wont find a thing... in fact, save your shipping, Seal -Er Up, BLOW -Er UP!  DALE JR!!! WOOT!  :-\
5) ***ANTITHESIS TO PREMISE AGREED*** ps (SSRIs, benzos, counseling sir) ;)

*Forgive me for wasting my own time replying(don't). 
*This was a horrible post (was funny, like you shooting Mexicans on GrandTheftAuto... JUST "Funny" .... ya?)
*It would have been funnier, my reply, being I love little animals who need air like anti-teddybears and   **anti-furrbees and anti-fake-animals, If i just got all pissed.  But I may have pissed you off instead with **this laborious thread you now have read.  It was dead, fred.  I gave it life!!!

Answer to the puzzle= LOL= Laughed out Loud.  In my head some, as well.
As i would tell anyone before doing anything hasty... death, korea, bad mess....
#educate!

+++ Things stated in-between these plus marks denoted all I needed to say and stop, with the point still, "hopefully conveyed", or #educate yourself!!!+++
*AUTHOR'S INTENDED PREMISE: ACCEPTED!!!!!

 1)Really a Margay! "I saw one, here!" (look up Said so)
     -- Im going to pet my Blue-horned Pet Mine-O-Soar.  ITS MINE. Ill "post ab it here"
 2)1000 g/cubed cm of #5 Blue Afghani-Durk... Good Price! Click! Let's do it all,, whatever it is!  ???
 3) +++ +1: Laplace, Pkiezenko98, and MasterBlaster: "Hero, Laugh of the Week Award: Edgy Man:
Touchy Topic!", anyone I quoted,  I think your cool actually +1, and LelMerioDici.... You sound familiar.  +1 to you... Im a smartass, btw, :) Nice to meet you.   ;)
 4)* LIFE IS SHORT!! DISSECT HUMOROUS BULLSHIT from PLAUSIBLE REAL BULLSHIT and HELPFUL SHIT*

ex: HUMOROUS BULLSHIT: (this was pretty obvious a joke, "pretty" obvious, #educate) and funny as a joke!
      PLAUSIBLE REAL BULLSHIT: Enjoy the sunrise tomorrow with your #5 Afgani-DIRT.  Sounded Cool.  Been
          cooler if Id a said #4, or #3? .... Hmmm....
      HELPFUL SHIT: Post a reply educating the dumbshit about that #5 if you know it's bullshit!!!!!
                                                   and
                       This reply is helpful shit counteracting rhetorical bullshit pissing you off with sound reason
                                          unless you get it....... which makes me a
                       HELPFUL SHIT who USES BULLSHIT TO PROVE/DISPROVE SHIT THAT I AM
                                      SARCASTICALLY SMARTASSED CERTIFIED AND ACCREDITED TO USE
                                           with SCIENCE, LOGIC, AND, +++"common-sense"+++
                                                to truly care enough to say
                                     
                                   I SEE THE MARGAY.  Search for "NARWHALLS"... AND PROTECT YOURSELF:
                                            where are we? oh yea.  Laugh some.  Read #4 Again.
                                                I invested 6 minutes of my fundane (-m) life
                                                   Hoping you would get this far.
                                                        Not really. Just read #4
                                                           Or be that "dumbass" ;)

I mothafuckin approve this long ass fuckin post, and thread, and STILL HATE SPAM TO FIDDY.  ???
D. LIQ  8)

Post-Op Disclaimer/Edit-tor-REAL:  Be safe people.  Read #4.  Being a smartass in a humorous post was warranted and I like humor (who does not?).  Not meant to poke funny haha's at anyone until they bleed... just to get attention.  Poke back.  I have armor :)  I hate things like: People not knowing about things (purchasing, knowledge, etc)... Help those guys out.  Don't chastise a sincere request from a newer one w/o more knowledge.  If the best you can tell him to do is "F-Off"... that's your best.  Congrats!  So take your own advice.  Inspirational Quote: "United we stand; Divided we ran" .. (Plausible Real BS Quote ;) )
Have a good day everyone it is yours: Make it that way if you want it that way :)