I had the house to myself last night, and I've been wanting to further push my limits when it comes to tripping so I decided to do just that. I've had a ton of experience with psychedelics. I've tried LSD, 4-ACO-DMT, 1P-LSD, ETH-LAD, Ketamine, MDMA, MDA, 6-APB, 4-FA, 2-FMA, Methylone, Mephredone, shrooms, cocaine, DPT, 2cb, 25i, 25c, Salvia, DXM, but have never broken through. In an attempt to breakthrough, I experienced more than I could have ever imagined was possible. I thought to myself, how bad could it be? haha boy was I in for a ride...
8:35 pm: Ingest one tab of LSD I've been holding onto for a few months. Probably won't do much, but only one way to find out.
9:40 pm: Ingest an additional half tab of ETH-LAD (approximately ~75 ug). Also been holding onto this for a while. Feeling something, but nowhere near what I'm trying to experience. Slight color enhancements, not much above threshold dose.
10:50 pm: Take approximately 25 mg of 4-HO-MET, combined with ~17 mg 4-ACO-DMT. Things are going to get interesting now. I'm very curious to see how the 4-ACO-DMT interacts with the other two given this was my first time combining it with another psych. ~12 am: Definitely tripping now. Music sounds incredible, colors are shifting, typical to any other trip. I feel a very warm feeling covering my body. The lighting in the room is a warm color, I have blankets, and my dog with me making me feel extremely comfortable. Things are starting to pick up, let's see how deep this can go.
~12:30 am: Take a bump of 2cb then about 30 minutes later another. Not certain of the dose but I'd say anywhere about ~10-20 mg. Holy shit!! The visuals have really picked up at this point, and fast! I have 10 hands moving around my field of view. Thoughts are growing increasingly hectic while I try to get my thoughts down. Still, nothing I couldn't handle. Feeling very content with the headspace, and the visuals are the most beautiful I've experienced, that is up until this point.
1:30 am: I'm watching a documentary on human behavior trying to gain new a perspective. This is when I decide I'm going through with attempting to break through. Weigh out the remainder of DPT I have. About 70 mg, up the nose. I've gotten use to the burn, and grown to like it, but my nose always gets stuffy after. I know it will get intense from here, but how much? That is what I underestimated, and will soon find out. I've gone up to 100+ mg of DPT, and it gets very intriguing at high doses. A wonderful substance for introspection. Let's find out how intense it'll be combined with everything else. (I start to think this is reckless, and it was, but I'm already set on going on a journey) (from here on I have no track of time): At this point I was listening to music, a Shpongle album, when all of a sudden the song started skipping/glitching & I got scared. Terrified actually. This is when I realized I was tripping a lot harder than ever before. I thought it was my computer, but I was confused because I had listened to that album plenty of times without it ever happening. I panic, but catch myself in a frantic state of mind so I center my breath. I'm back, but woah... That was the first time I ever came that close to absolutely losing it. I have underestimated how deep one can actually go. I changed the music to one of my favorite songs to listen while tripping, Tickling the Amygdala, another Shpongle song. The song gets super intense & makes my mind go crazy. I'm laying down with my eyes closed & I start to visualize my body disappearing. My body goes numb & all I see is everything get super bright. The disassociation felt similar to a K-Hole, but somehow more intense. I feel an energy start to build inside of me and beam up to the sky, but I lose concentration at how much it caught me off guard. All this was before the song even dropped. It felt like an hour had gone by. As the song keeps going I keep trying to lose myself but it's incredibly difficult to want to lose myself, while still being myself. Like a dog chasing its tail, running around in circles getting no closer than when I started. Reminded me of Buddhism and the endless want for desire.
Finally I somehow let go without even trying. I feel my energy build up again & shoot out of my third eye. I shot out with more energy than I ever felt before. I was a beam of light that was dancing in the universe, flowing effortless. It was the definition of pure bliss. I was the universe, I was everything. I was a blue light with pinks, white, & purple beams trailing off.
After a minute or two I shot back down to my body. The song is over & it takes me a while to understand what happened to me. I took off my headphones & started to cry, amazed at how beautiful that was. What in the world had I experienced?? My tears feel incredibly rejuvenating. All of my worries and stress I didn't know I had washed off.
At this point my trip gets 2000x more intense than before, and a lot more confusing. Every time I close my eyes I heard a sound revving up but sort of flops, & feel myself trying to get warped back into the universe. Like in a video game when the player hasn't powered up completely.
This kept happening over and over & over again throughout the night. When I tried to really focus again I almost shot out of my body, but everything was extremely dull, colors were dark. Overall similar to before, but the complete opposite. Yin & yang. Which I realized a while later.
This is when my house turned to a swampy style of visuals, no longer the bright neon colors from before. I thought in order to have another out of body experience, I needed to understand how to harness the all forms of energy. Now being ground, earthy energy. The ceiling turned a brown color, leaves appeared everywhere. The energy felt very powerful around me. This is when I began realized the true extent of how much I could control my trip. Anything I was thinking about would appear in front of me.
I got angry at one point for some reason & it was pure rage building up. I felt the room started shaking even & my dog woke up scared. When I looked over at my dog I noticed how far I was going off with anger, and did my best to simmer down.
The visuals went hand in hand with whatever emotion I was feeling at the moment. When I was upset the room turned into a blue, purple color. Anger was a dark red/orange. Every epiphany made the room go white.
The audio hallucinations were unlike anything I experienced before. I heard people celebrating for me, talking to me in a very alien-like, yet familiar voice, an airplane was right above my house and even shaking the room. I saw a ufo in the corner of the room descending, & if I paid more attention to that thought I could have very well seen aliens. I got a small glimpse of them, but was too frightening to focus.
At one point I realized how deep I was and I bowed my head in respect to the universe, I felt humbled to be experiencing this, & my mind was flooded with information about the universe. What was it? I wish I could coherently explain, but it seems like human language is incapable of such a task.
Throughout this time, the trip took on certain colors, emotions, and energies. It felt as if my chakras were being opened, one after the other. I went through a full spectrum of human emotion, with full intensity.
When I was somewhat coherent enough to remember time even existed, it was like 6 am. I didn't know if that was even real though. I was so gone I heard voices talking to me, sound effects, & when I looked at my phone, the words were things I was thinking, not what I was actually reading. I was not certain of what I was actually seeing or hearing.
The trip is a little hazy, and there's so much I could try to explain, but it wouldn't be enough. It reminded me of what I read an Ayuhasca trip was like. All the layers of the self being ripped apart. There was no mercy, & I was strapped onto the ride even if I wanted out.
I noticed how easy it was for me to lose complete grip of reality and sanity. I was confident it couldn't be so bad, but I was dead wrong. In fact I almost lost it and handful of times. If hadn't had the right intentions going in I could have ended up in the hospital.
This was the most beautiful, inspiring, chaotic, terrifying, and utterly awe-inspiring of my night, and I'm grateful to have a chance to experience it.
"Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the weather."