Housemates stole my mail and now want to sell it to me. How to play it?

Someone on reddit was sending me a vapourizer for practically free. Deal was I'd buy pizza for him. The tracking showed delivered in the mailbox, but I never got it. I got to mailbox just an hour after tracking said delivered. I talk to one of those housemates (girl from a couple) and she said she'd just checked the mail. I got the key from her, asked her if she'd received my package, but she said no. Thankfully, the reddit user who sent me the vape sympathized and did not accept anything for it. He said he didn't have use for it anyway.

Now many months later, the guy from the couple tells me he bought a vapourizer from amazon for $30. Amazon doesn't even sell vapes. Anyway, he offered to show it to me. Said he doesn't know how to use it. I knew it was mine as soon as I saw it. It is a really great device costing $150+ at least. The motherfucker wants to sell it to me for $30 because "that's what he got it for".

On one hand it is still a good deal and I'm not paying more than I'd originally planned. On the other hand these people are clearly fucking with me.

I can blame them and create a scene, but I have to spend another 5 months in the same house. And they offer me food, drinks etc, acting nice in every other way. This course of action most probably wouldn't achieve anything good.

I can try bargaining down to $20? Not bad, but I'd still feel I lost the game.

I refuse the offer. It's not like I need the thing. I can just not play the game. They don't know how to use it. Seriously. They barely even smoke weed. So it's a device that goes to waste and I don't lose anything really, but they still win.

I'm looking for ideas (and any stupid jokes you can crack) here. What would be the logical thing to do?

EDIT: Thank you for all your ideas people. Each one really helped me look at the situation from a different perspective. I've decided to not play the game. I don't think I'm capable of dealing with this head on. I want home to feel comfortable, not awkward. When I come home from work or college I want to feel safe, not hostile. As far as I am concerned, I have lost nothing and I'd like to keep it that way. They can try and play me, but I will not budge. But now I am certain they are thieves. They will not get anything from me anymore. I will not offer, I will refuse if they ask, and I will take precautions that they cannot lay their hands on stuff that matters to me. And finally, before I move out, I will leave them a special something. I am open to any ideas what that might be. Ideally, I would like to dedicate as little effort and money to such scumbags.

EDIT 2: As many have pointed out, I shouldn't let others take such advantage of me. I know I shouldn't, but I am really struggling to see anything positive outcome from a confrontation. Instead, I've thought of something like this. If they offer to sell it to me again, I will say that I have already given them some acid and let the girl smoke my weed many times. That's already worth more than the vape and the least they could do is "return the favour". That's the best I can come up with.

EDIT 3: More people have come out telling I'm a pussy and weak and etc. I agree with those people. I also agree that the right way to go about this would be to confront and take back what is rightfully mine. Unfortunately, I am weak. I cannot stand up for myself. Social situations leave me vulnerable and almost scared. As much as I'd want to barge into their room claiming my vape, I will freak out before I even enter their room. So sorry you guys who want justice. I don't have it in me.


Comments


[166 Points] Tehtacticalpanda:

Well first you cover the room in plastic to make clean up easier...


[155 Points] NoLie_Trueeeeee:

Im out dis bitch.


[84 Points] RIP_Meth_9000:

Order some METH.....Bang the GF....Seems like a fair trade.....Bahahahahahaaha!!!!!!


[51 Points] ForLol_Serious:

Buy some counterfeit monies off AB and pay him with it.


[34 Points] dwolfy:

Type up an official letterhead or something. Tell them a detective stopped by and was asking questions in regard to someone in the house ordering and receiving drug paraphernalia through the mail. Show them the letter "he left" which discloses the model/make of the vaporizer and tell them you had no idea but told him you had two other roommates thatd you ask about. Say that he said he would come by later in the week to speak to them.

Edit: tell them he said nobody in the house can leave the city/state until the investigation is over


[21 Points] niggerplease2:

Here's what I would do You have access to an internet array of mail order drugs. Clean THE FUCK out of your living area (pc, everything. Unless you have hidden partition don't even have pc onsite) order some nice and large sized packs to homeboy, snitch on his ass and watch him get fried. To sweeten the frosting, hide some really super illegal powders like coke or heroin, cut to shit, in his room. Cops charge based on weight not purity, leave that fucker with an oz of 10% pure coke complete with scales, bags, everything. Warning: this is a nuclear option, but if played correctly will result in ultimate decimation to your opponent with little to no risk to yourself.


[15 Points] None:

deleted What is this?


[13 Points] None:

I don't know about logical but I wouldn't fuck with them considering your situation. It ain't worth it. If they offered you in other stuff like you said, you're pretty much even. Just know they're potential thieves and act accordingly.


[11 Points] octomarvel:

deep sigh

Okay, plenty of options...

Or...

Or...

Or...

I would personally go for 3, followed by 2 and then 1 but hey, that's me.

=)


[10 Points] MrBalloonHand:

Consider the possibility that the boyfriend trying to sell it to you doesn't even know the whole story. It seems like she decided on a whim to steal your mail months ago. He might be in the dark and the bullshit amazon story might just be what he's been told.

Personally, I'd pay for it and them mention how it's exactly the same vape that was stolen from your mail, and that amazon doesn't sell vapes. Letting them know they're not actually getting away with anything is enough.

Having hostile situations with roommates is tough, and anyone telling you to kick his ass is a 16-year-old. Can you lock the door to your room? Keep a close eye on all your shit for the next five months, especially on moving day, when things might get "lost in the shuffle."


[9 Points] HiragiGhost:

IMO, go the passive aggressive route. Ask about which Amazon store they got the vaporiser from, ask them to pull up the webpage so you can have a look.

Naturally they'll refuse but keep fucking going with it. Ask 'can you just tell me the name of the store? I'm interested in the other stuff they could be stocking. It sounds like you got a really awesome deal, I'd love to see what else there is.'

Mention how an old friend decided to gift you a very similar one, ask if it's a specific make, because you're sure your vaporiser was the same. Crazy coincidence, right? Mention that you're really pissed because for some reason, it never turned up, and your friend has no idea what the hell happened, he's proven to you that it got sent and everything.

It was something of an heirloom between you and your fictional buddy (who conveniently lives far away). Some guy you used to smoke up with in high school. 'You guys should meet him sometime! Maybe we all can share your vaporiser one night! He'd be glad to see that there's at least something really similar out there we can use, even if it's not our heirloom, right?'

Even if you can't exchange anything much more than guilt out of them, watch their reactions very closely. Eyeball the hell out of them.

Ps., was there any particular marking or design about the vaporiser that makes it unique? I would ask your Reddit pal about that if you can get into contact with him. Does he have pictures that he sent you?


[6 Points] None:

I'd refuse it and play dumb. Save up enough enough to move out in 5mo. Use this time to save and plot your next post to /r/prorevenge.

Obviously one of them is trying to scam you.


[3 Points] None:

just cassually bring it up in conversation. dont accuse them of anything jus say something like. "man that looks JUST like the vaporizer i bought online that didnt get delivered, thats pretty crazy." or pull the "hey i went on amazon and couldnt find vapes, i really want one since i bought one and it never came. where did u get yours again?"


[3 Points] Solid716:

Stop being a bitch and bash that fuckers face in.


[2 Points] NOT-A-FUCKING-TROLL:

Just pay for it and finesse their ass later.


[2 Points] jjcooli0h:

I'm an extremely peaceful human being, but that said... when a third party steals something personal, that is where I'm typically more than ready to invoke violence, or at least the bonafide threat thereof. In this case I would simply snatch the vaporizer thingy from out of their hands and warn them that if they steal anything else from you, then you're prepared to steal the teeth from out of their head. YMMV.


[2 Points] MakingitAHABIT:

Maaaan. Its times like this where you either make 'grown-up' choices or stay in Neverland Ranch. SUCK IT UP. And SAY HELL YEAH I WANT IT. Snatch that shit, and say "finders keepers BITCH." "Do Something little punk ass fuck." and walk away with you vaporizerer or whatever and leav him pissing in his boots. DONT TAKE THAT SHIT. THEY'LL KEEP DOING IT. AND fuck the cops, dont get them involved. They do nothing but cause harder times for everyone. Bro trust me. Don't let them think your that stupid. They will do it over and over again. Either that or change the mailbox keep the only key. Buy a new one or buy that one if you really really want it. A least it would suggest that your NOT THAT STUPID. 5 months is nothing keep you shit locked. Get some fucking Nabiscos if you want snacks. Male or Female, you shouldn't let anyone 1up you like that without consent. You soft and meek, frail person if you think that any other way is a good way to handle shit like this. I -personally- have better shit to do than deal with that.


[2 Points] itsbooming:

The deciding factor here is they live with you. You might have to eat shit on this one. I wouldn't try to get back at them at least not overtly. If you can tax them when they want to get drugs, this to me is satisfying as you usually reach a new plateau on price as well as get revenge.

If you had a better relationship (just going by the fact that you asked the question) you could smoke a j with them then be like , "why you fucking with my mail man, you know thats fucked up" this would have to be said in a none threatening natural way which I don't think you are capable of pulling off and will come off creepy if not done right. Worst case scenerio is "wtf man, you calling me a theif" fast forward you get your asskicked in your own place.

Oh you gave them acid? Unless there is a saturated marked there you should be able to define the price. Just charge them 15 a tab and smile inside with every sale.


[2 Points] dudewheresmypack:

I had the same shit happen to me, only my roommate took my benzos, forcing me to have withdrawals. Needless to say, I was pissed, and I was ready to smash his face in with a baseball bat, but I went the passive-agressive route instead.

If you guys share a router or have internet access to his, find out your router's login page, then go to the section where you can prioritize which devices receive bandwidth. I put my roommates to the lowest point, rather than just turning it off, in order to fuck with him even more (which worked). It took about an hour for a YouTube video to load, and I know because I would hear his video start and stop about every ten minutes. He was the type of dude who would sit online yelling at his video games all day, and hearing the dead silence in his room was pure satisfaction. Also, I had the postal service hold any further packs. You may want to set up a P.O. box.

EDIT: Change the login pass on the router. (not the WiFi pass) Confronting them will probably lead to them denying it. My dumb roommate put my letter back in the mail (he was just holding it hostage) while I had USPS hold all my mail, so I knew he did it, but he never admitted to it the number of times I told him to give it back.


[2 Points] None:

[deleted]


[2 Points] rooparoop:

you will be played, toyed, and stolen from more than you can count in the next 5 months - and probably be left mentally broken down too if you kneel and succumb to this bullshit.


[2 Points] HipsterSal:

Those are some shitty/shady ass people you live with, I'd get the fuck out of there. Don't associate with those kinds of people.

If that shit was done to me, I'd return the favor 10 fold. Start taking by getting your stuff spotless and non incriminating first. Get into their computer and look into their browser history, blackmail those fucks. Steal their mail and shred that shit, especially important documents. Turn the living quarters into a fucking mess, and refuse to clean it up. Just lie like them and tell them it wasn't you.

EVEN BETTER take a shit in the bathroom and kitchen sink and deny all responsibility.

Eventually when they confront you, tell them " I don't appreciate my things being stolen from me, I Especially hate it when the thief tries play it off like it's theirs and they want to sell it back to me. You will find more shit in the sink if you don't comply with my terms"

And then just lay out the terms. OH and make sure you eat tons of corn for the shits in the sinks, It'll be hilarious when they see corn i n your stool.


[2 Points] gtechIII:

I had my backpack stolen by a kid when I was in grade school. Only he was stupid enough to use it for school. I knew an identifying mark: my cousin left crayons in the front pocket. So I waited until he was in public in front of students and parents. I asked him to publicly affirm it was his, asked him what writing implements were in the front pocket, then proved it was mine by mentioning and showing the crayons.

Simple, proportionate attack, and satisfies all of your desired outcomes.


[2 Points] MarloStanfield1:

Fill the house with uppercuts


[1 Points] Morvu:

you have access to a store sellings cockroaches and other bugs?

leave them a nice present when moving out is what i would do...


[1 Points] FuckTheJakes:

You forgot to mention how you didn't tell anyone about your pack, he just stole it on a whim.


[1 Points] now_its_a_dick_joke:

Send yourself a small bag of animal shit, spring loaded with confetti and glitter.


[1 Points] my_dn_account:

i've been in hostile living situations before, and honestly if you want to just man up and confront them, thats not a bad way to go about it. just throw it out in the open, both of you know that the vape is not his.

or.....just leave it, if you think itll create an awkward or hostile living situation for ya, i'd just forget about it if you're not gunna confront them out in the open


[1 Points] heroing:

Report him for opening your mail


[1 Points] thehaga:

Isn't there some anti selling illegal goods law - that's why pawn stores all have that thing. Maybe you can buy it and fuck him over with that somehow. It sounds like a small claims thing you could probably win esp with receipts etc.


[1 Points] NoEgo:

Pay $30 now and let it go. Don't force "revenge". Karma is funny and tends to right itself. In this case, he'll become lax because he "got away with it" and fuck up later. More than likely, the later fuck up will cost him a lot more than $30.

Seriously, try it. It's only a $30 experiment and you aren't giving into the desire to be vengeful which is always good in the long run.


[1 Points] evil_olive23:

Burn their house down.


[1 Points] nairda89:

Don't be a pussy and confront them already. They stole mail from you and that is a federal offense.


[1 Points] darlantan:

Pay them for it, then steal the $30 back at the first available opportunity -- or convince them to buy you pizza / whatever a few times and say "you'll get them back for it later", then never do. $30 isn't much, but there's the principle of the thing.

Most importantly, make sure you've got a working lock on your bedroom.

Not really worth starting some shit over, but if I were you I'd bring it up right before I left. It's possible maybe the dude doesn't know his chick is doing this shit?


[1 Points] None:

I think you are right not to hit this head on, chip away at it over the course of 5 months & ensure you recoup the amount of pain and suffering.

Masturbating into their food, replace birth control items with inactive substitutes, if they use condoms, put holes in them, encouraging food poisoning by adding something that has a high chance of being infected. Put a small dead fish somewhere that will cause a putrid stench but they will not be able to find the source.

Do this right till the end and do it in a way where they will not link the incidents up then before you part ways say something that helps them tie it all together.

Worst case scenario - This is an amazing coincidence and they never stole it (always a possibility no matter how slim) If you found out this was the case it would be hard to live with what you put them through.


[1 Points] Schmaxx:

I would definitely clean the inside of the toilets with their tooth brush.


[1 Points] wutang76xx:

Jack his mothers ashes. Hold off for a month, let those emotions sink in. Then when he has accepted he has lost his mothers last remains, offer to sell the ashes back to him for 30$


[1 Points] Vendor_BBMC:

Revenge won't make you feel better.

Just say "that looks like the one I bought but never arrived, even though the tracking said it did". Then watch their reaction.

With tracked mail in the UK, you see the signature of the person who accepted it.


[1 Points] htlr_lvr:

amazon def sells vapes tho


[1 Points] None:

Just go in his room when he leaves and steal it back. Don't use it though. Keep it hidden and sell it in Craigslist. No money for him. Money for you.


[1 Points] thatskank:

Call the police. Misdemeanor theft, duh!


[1 Points] greatoctober:

lmao just ask to check it out or hit or something and then tell him to fuck off when you have it. tell him off or w.e you want if you're feeling it


[1 Points] CaptainColeslaw:

What type of Vape a it? Model? Atomizer or mod?


[1 Points] ethyl_:

Good catch


[1 Points] FUBARtheinsane:

OP have read the thread and understand you don't want confrontation. In that case, decline all contact and don't give them another opportunity.


[1 Points] NorthernMaster:

Seduce the girl,have some fun with it, then get ermmm careless with some pictures you have made.


[1 Points] topknotch89:

ok its mad early, let me see if understood this correctly. the couple you are living stole your mail, months later the dude tries to sell you the thing back he originally stole from you. so they both jacked u.. bro you need to get you shit back, no questions. i dont see the predicament here...


[1 Points] BigDickedUnicorn:

Easy. Kill him and get it for free from his dead body.


[1 Points] None:

Leave a big old dump on there sofa as a going away present,, see how they feel when they have to pick up a human shit with a dog shit bag..


[1 Points] clientnotfound:

You've learned the cost of roommates w.o any actual cost.


[1 Points] noscope360gokuswag:

Get the redditor to send you screenshots and pics of the vape and show it to your housemate.

In the coming weeks before you move out, eat subway a couple times. Save the long plastic bags they come in. The day before and when you move out, poop in said bags. Whole logs, don't skimp here. Last step: hide them in really fucking good spots ie in vents, back behind the fridge, down by the furnace, get creative! Then never go back again and laugh your ass off.


[1 Points] Confused5464:

If you wan to mess with them but not like anything crazy I'd say I don't wanna buy it it because I ordered one while ago, and it it got stolen out of the mail box and the cops are looking into it, say you already went in and they want them to go in too because theres a camera that can see your mail box and only you two opened that day


[1 Points] narkant:

Leave a good old sneaky poo somewhere as others have mentioned, my person favorite I've heard of is taking all the butter out of the container shitting in it and replacing the butter.


[1 Points] Fenris9:

Why the fuck would he try to sell it to the person it was originally mailed to? If he had any brains he'd sell it to someone else entirely. If he had at least half a brain he'd research it and figure out what it was worth before trying to sell it for $30 too.


[1 Points] rustyX211:

ayy punch him in the face! use the force of 10000 suns! the only way is s the punch in the face way!


[1 Points] ArabianMeatShops:

This is some next level scumbag shit right here.


[1 Points] Downvotesohoy:

You're kind of a pussy. No offence, but you need to stand up for yourself and take your vape back.


[1 Points] Psychedeltrees:

Do this to all their drinks https://i.imgur.com/XXhfFSw.gifv


[1 Points] Lucid_Enemy:

Go to a costume shop and have a friend they don't know dress up in a police uniform have them knock and ask to speak to said person have them identify as a postal inspector and say they are investigating a federal crime of stolen mail... I think you know the rest extra points if you can get more then one and have them show up after the first person to "arrest" the individual that'll teach them real good


[1 Points] NoLie_Trueeeeee:

Im out dis bitch.


[1 Points] blamehofmann:

Get a PO box from now on. You don't want them stealing your mail, no matter what arrives in the letterbox.


[1 Points] Rollerpig23:

Tell him you would love to purchase the vape of him at such a great price but on the condition he provides a receipt for the device as you wouldn't feel comfortable purchasing it without one


[1 Points] johnnyrickshaw420:

Just be direct.

You don't need to be aggressive or angry; just direct. How you choose to do that is up to you.

Then just take it.

Just get to the point, make it known that it's yours, you know he stole it, then take it. While he's there, in front of him. No need to make a big ordeal about it. I've dealt with more thieves than I can count, and this works pretty well across the board. Thieves are cowards. I guess in all fairness most of them knew they would get the fuck beaten out of them if they didn't comply, but it almost never came to that, or even threats.

Then fuck around with him on the back-end however you see fit.

There's a lot of people bullshitting on there about how they would just beat his ass and be done with it lol, guarantee 95% of those people have never even been in a fist fight, so don't let them make you feel bad.

Good luck and have fun with it. You are sanctioned by reightousness to do whatever kind of fuckery you see fit to these people, so enjoy yourself.

ETA: Or steal it and beat his ass after you find a new place. Just don't put yourself in a situation where you have to live with an enemy for 5 months.


[1 Points] nugymmer:

If you can't stick up for yourself over something as trivial as this, what chance do you have when it's something with very high stakes?

You would be the guy who would let cops turn your abode upside down without a warrant.

Don't be a princess. I would have belted the ever loving fecal matter out of this asshole. You should never tolerate theft, not ever.


[0 Points] None:

[deleted]


[0 Points] PolyHigh09:

What vendor is dumb enough to let some one send them a pizza as payment? Wouldn't that require him to give you his address?

Vendors opsec -100/10

You sure he sent it? 100% sure. If he didn't want anything maybe it never got sent.

But if you know for a fact they stole this from you then i highly suggest confronting them. It shouldn't be awkward for you l. But it should feel very awkward for the theives.

Why pretend like nothing happened, those type of people will just see this as weakness and continue to steal from you


[0 Points] Darknettoker:

Lol @ the "edits" you pansy call the idiot out for stealing from you.


[-1 Points] trappy_AB:

if i retire from drugs and crime this will be the post that made me do it.


[-1 Points] Raigek:

Dude I would fuck them up. Where is your backbone? They fucked you over, return the favor

EDIT: Read the rest of the thread, good luck at coming up with a good plan


[-2 Points] half_a_brain:

If you're not a pussy nigga you'll beat there ass.