2016 DUMBASS awards show!

Hi I'm trappy. You know me from things and places. I'll be hosting this year's DUMBASS awards show! A show where people may submit their encounters with this year's possible TOP dumbass!

Being an insider I have access to the kinds of dumbassery that you can only dream of, but I'm not the only person who has encountered dumbasses and so this awards show is being opened up to the community.

Please, share your experiences here of your encounters so stupid that you feel compelled to nomiate towards the top DUMBASS of 2016.

The winner of this contest will be crowned 2016's TOP dumbass. If you feel that you have been unfairly nominated please consider:

Thank you. May you all enjoy the humor and avoid further encounters with dumbasses. At request I may provide some of my experiences with my personal, top 2016 dumbasses.


Comments


[113 Points] bibsdogsknob:

Id like to submit this post


[101 Points] zysr90:

I'd like to submit myself for disputing an alphabay transaction and expecting someone to assist me


[35 Points] None:

I'd like to nominate myself because I've never won anything in my life and I think it would be cool to win an award.


[29 Points] trynakick:

For as entertaining/sad as it was, the u/DNM_cunt saga suggests he isn't the brightest crayon in the box.


[28 Points] None:

BBMC for most likely to talk about selling drugs without actually selling any drugs


[24 Points] TheActivators:

Got to be that vendor that sent that letter with "we will call anonymous to your police" What a dumbass that guy is, if anyone paid they're even dumber, i've not been here long though so i'm sure that will be beaten. Also thanks for your help earlier trappy!


[22 Points] None:

[deleted]

What is this?


[19 Points] 710soldier:

I'd like to nominate GoldenStateBars for dumbass of the year. The xanax scammer who doxxed himself by posting from his personal reddit account during an argument (with someone who exposed him as a scammer) on thebarbclan sub . Which resulted in him giving out double reships to everyone affected. I have never seen a scammer as inept as GSB. I ended up with over 2k for $500 and he ended either in rehab based on a post he made or just switched usernames and is reading this right now...stranger things...


[17 Points] FuckTheJakes:

Probably the guy who got arrested for falling asleep in a McDonald's bathroom for a few hours after using heroine with more heroine in his pocket

Edit. While on probation


[19 Points] OpiLuvr:

The guy who's taken over Medibuds account, or the Bloomsfield market rep.


[12 Points] None:

I would like to nominate this post with picture included from another I sub I mod.

Title: question on quality cocaine with my comment included.

http://imgur.com/a/l2h6J


[8 Points] iamunlimited:

Whistleblower german faggot


[6 Points] Lucid_Enemy:

Big muscles asking for PRIVATE PGP keys not PUBLIC, PRIVATE PGP keys


[5 Points] None:

I would like to contend for the position of top dumbass


[4 Points] KoreaLemonade:

That fucking retard Korea lemonade on DHL, what a fucking tool amirite?


[3 Points] Fetus_In_Anus:

SacDirtyCrew


[3 Points] Vendor_BBMC:

I would like to nominate the vendor who tried to blackmail and extort Alpraking using the threat of doxxing him, under the alias "Minervathrowaway", thinking that he wouldn't be spotted.

Both /u/theopiateking and I suspected it, and we both spotted it when he accidentally confirmed it https://www.reddit.com/r/DarkNetMarkets/comments/4tje2r/pelican_trust_rex/d5hycla?context=3

As predicted, he deleted Minervathrowaway immediately https://www.reddit.com/r/DarkNetMarkets/comments/4tk0dx/i_got_minervathrowaway_to_delete_their_reddit/

It was only tonight that I saw this two month old Alpraking post, and realized that the vending bird is suicidal, stupid, or both. https://www.reddit.com/r/DarkNetMarkets/comments/4sxi4p/get_over_it_with_the_whole_doxxing_no_body/d7mlr2h

Nobody is going to top trying to blackmail the Q man for stupidity, so please step up to the podium to accept your dumbass award, /u/pelican_vendor

Assuming you still have kneecaps. For when one ventures out of the virtual world into the realm of the physical, by doxxing, one invites physical consequences. He who lives by the sword etc etc


[2 Points] CocaineReeboks:

I've never laughed at the word dumbass so much in my life LOL.


[2 Points] ciphersexual:

I hereby nominate the AlphaBay QA/QC team for signing off on the public release of the API where you could read everyone's messages simply by incrementing the ID in the URL string.


[2 Points] nakedsnake-bigboss:

For me it has to be a purchase that I made very recently. I knew a package would be arriving over the weekend but was out parting and decided that it will be fine and will just check and pay when I arrived home Sunday. Well I get home Sunday to be told that only one package had arrived even though tracking was saying it was delivered. I think to myself, 'Ok I have had this happen before where it is marked as being there but shows up the next day usually'. Next day comes being Monday as no mail on Sunday and still not the one that was supposed to be here. In this time I am letting the vendor know that I was told nothing arrived and was willing to release half the funds as it appears to be a USPS issue. Next comes Tuesday and again no package so at this point I am wondering what is going on. On the Wednesday I find from the Postal worker that it was delivered and to call the main number to figure out how to proceed. At learning this my roommate then decides to remember that there was another package that was delivered on Saturday and that it was left on the table. The issue is that on Sunday upon arriving home there was nothing on the table. Sunday night also happens to be our recycling night. From what I have concluded is that the package arrived on Saturday was put on the table and was taken out with the recyclables before I arrived home on Sunday. Well there goes an Oz of oil that I was rather excited to try and now I was left with regret for not getting the money to the vendor earlier. Lesson learned from this is make sure you are home to get your mail before someone else throws it away.


[2 Points] Novelty-Bobble:

Got to be the xanax vendor that tried to shill from his personal reddit and doxxed himself.


[1 Points] Daseetmane:

Hmm.. I'll just dance away then. Anyone want to drop some really fucked up speedcore so I could dance like I'm having a grand mal seizure?


[1 Points] pinochetHA:

I'd like to nominate that guy who offered to pay for a dox of my site (on reddit lol) and getting me locked up, and later got his reddit account banned. That was a guy who appreciated that the interwebz is serious fucking business.


[1 Points] None:

[deleted]


[1 Points] Vinnie_Barbarino:

I'm sure I got this. It's just hard to narrow it down. I've got so many "dumbass" moments.


[1 Points] andblowyourhousedown:

Nominating /u/DaDankWank for this post.


[-5 Points] GotMeSomeAlpandMDMA:

I would like to nominate your mom, for having you.

Edit: pwnd


[-5 Points] buddahbean:

This is why I stay away from alphabay. Grow up.