Nah but seriously. First I am in the UK, and recently at stupid o'clock at night the police knocked on my door and asked to see (let's call the person A) A. I told them that A did not live here (true). I understand people advise to put your own name on the package but this does not apply to every situation, I would explain more but I will not to protect myself. At this point the police looked confused, and asked for my details, I gave them this, and they said they might be in touch. After this I proceed to wipe everything and remove all evidence. Then the very next day my package arrived with A's name on it, less than an hour after my other mail came. No signature, just put through the letter box. I felt the package and I could feel what was inside. Stealth was terrible. So I set it aside with my junk mail and unwanted mail. I'm pretty sure the police are going to turn up eventually and ask if I received any mail in A's name, and if they can't find it they'll fuck me up. In the package was a large amount of Class A drugs, not going to specify. Also package was late, but just by a few days. I was just wondering if there was anything I should do? Or not do? Or will I get abused anally, lube recommendations?
EDIT: Also package looked fine and not tampered with, not ordered from this vender before so I don't know if this is usual packaging.
No worries matie. You have a few good options.
Let's assume "Person A" is a fake name.
Leave it where it is, if pigs turn up it's still not much to do with you.
Pick it up, write "Not at this address" on it and take it someplace safe if you're stopped with it. Well you were just doing your bit for the Royal Mail having them return it to sender.
It's an unusual situation cause if the name is a fake why would the police be looking for them. There is no way in HELL the police are giving you a package they know if full of a suspicious substance let alone a Class A drug. (If they opened it they have tested it rest assured).
Does it look tampered with? Anyways you're doing the right thing. Clean house (as you should ALWAYS be doing anyways). Making sure you look like a honest chap who doesn't even visit these forums...
TL;DR If I were you, I would dispose of it as much as possible. If it's an amount you can consume in a reasonable timeframe do so. If not you want to get it away from you. Write "Not at this address" on it and take it someplace safe.