Was about use my last BTC to order and that bitch was down. Saved me from a weak ass moment and a relapse. Lost some coin but kept me from repeating that nightmare. I'll take it.
Fuck it, I'm glad AB is gone. 37 days clean from H.
Was about use my last BTC to order and that bitch was down. Saved me from a weak ass moment and a relapse. Lost some coin but kept me from repeating that nightmare. I'll take it.
[371 Points] infr4r3d:
[38 Points] None:
[deleted]
[25 Points] None:
[deleted]
[29 Points] JoseFernandes:
I lost 30$ on AB and that's a small price to pay if that helped you stay clean.
Keep it up.
[14 Points] None:
Do you smoke pot?
Seems like a much healthier replacement.
(not as dumb as it may sound)
[13 Points] thejournalists:
You need a hobby. Use those addict tendencies to get lost in something that makes your life better. I'd suggest the gym.
Stronglifts is great: https://stronglifts.com/
Jim Stopani's Shortcut to Size is great: https://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/shortcut-to-size-phase-1-week-1-day-1.html
[11 Points] MT_Merchant_Mangler:
Fuck man, My PMs are blowing up with free sample offers. I'm good fellas.
[9 Points] None:
[deleted]
[4 Points] AgentOrange256:
stay clean my man
[6 Points] delaware:
Congrats dude. I've been struggling with a behavioural addiction for almost 15 years now. I can't imagine what dealing with an addiction on the physical level with something like dope would be like.
[5 Points] goldandguns:
Make sure to use of any treatment programs you can. post detox recidivism rates are bonkers w/o meds.
[4 Points] IPodJoe:
Congrats homie
[4 Points] connorhall70:
I'm happy for ya bro stay away from that shit! I read the comments and see how good you say you feel now! Keep it that way!
[4 Points] VeronicaMonica:
You should be extremely proud of yourself for having the discipline and dedication to stay clean for that long and also coming to the realization that you don't want H to be in your life anymore. It's going to be a challenge but you are doing what's best for you; that's what I consider self love/respect and I hope you never lose that.
Wishing you absolute strength, will, courage and resilience to overcome, prevail and conquer your demons.
Hang in there and please never give up on yourself. We're all rooting for you!! <3
[4 Points] For_supreme2:
When I was tapering off xans I started hitting the gym to get my mind of things an god bless it helps
[4 Points] anon12590:
2 years off skag now, best decision you'll ever make. Life is so much better without it. You got it man!
[5 Points] None:
I know the feeling man. I left my hometown to escape my speed addiction. Then I left that town to escape my ketamine addiction. Then the dnm made it all too easy to keep going. I'm just glad it takes 2+ weeks for a pack to get here from over seas. So I'll just order a bit once I'm out and will have 2-3weeks of sobriety till the next pack. I'm happy now :)
[4 Points] None:
That success is yours because it's not like it's not available. AB here or on a beach after scamming us, doesn't matter. Those 37 days are yours, and only yours. We can all be glad that shithold is gone, but don't give it credit that really is all yours. I've read Kratom can welp with your struggle, take a look if you feel you need a little help. Whatever you do today, make tomorrow number 38. Congratulations
[3 Points] TheShattering:
Addiction is a rough one but you can get through it. I am five years without a drink (my drug of choice) and I cannot stress enough how much better life is now that I quit. Any time you get the urge to use (which will pass eventually) just remember the withdrawals. The reminder of the withdrawals always keeps me away from drinking. Keep it up!!
[4 Points] toombo:
Congratulations man, I hope you succeed. I went through that whole 12-step program. I went to rehab and lived in a sober house for a year and I didn't see anyone staying sober. I would literally be walking over someone who is overdosing on the floor, and I would run to my room so I don't get mixed up in any legal issues. I stayed sober the whole time and went to meetings, got a sponsor, got a sponsee. I really believed I was changed. But as soon as I got off probation, I left the court and went str8 to get high. I was speeding to the dope house and laughing at all these suckers that believe I would actually change. That was when I was young, now I have no room for error cause next time it's gonna be the feds that I gotta deal with. My point is don't waste your time with the 12 step program or you'll end up looking stupid saying "hey my name is harry and I'm an addict". And now everyone knows your a crack head, and a thief. Those are my favorite people to rob. lol
[4 Points] None:
hey so just popping in to say reading is a fantastic way to spend the time. Trick your brain. Trick it for a very long time, until that faking it becomes making it. I trick mine with books, weed and movies. I remove all bad people who like me on bad drugs, out of my life, and I move away figurative and literal from the negative things in my life...try gardening. I started with 5 herbs, basil, bayleaf, parsley, cilantro, mint. And then I learned how to cook with those ingredients. My dad is a heroin/speed addict who is also addicted to child porn. My mom, speed, pills, alcohol and gambling. She's dead. He's almost. I ain't going out like that.
[4 Points] DNMarley13:
Great job, bro, keep it up! My last dose I woke up naked in my bathroom with a (few) shots of narcan with EMTS standing over me - only took a "small" 50mg shot (but had been eating Xanax like candy, and it was very very strong dn dope) and I haven't touched the shit since (precipitated withdrawal from narcan is something I never want to experience again).
I was addicted to "street" heroin for years (never OD'd back then somehow), got clean for a few years, discovered the DNMs and OD'd around 5 times (as in not breathing, had to have narcan to get me breathing again - somehow it didn't scare me until the last one where I was laying next to a broken toilet completely naked - room mate heard me fall breaking the top of the toilet, kicked in the bathroom door and called 911) in a short period of time (less then a year).
I should be dead, but for some reason I'm not - AA/NA can help (I still attend occasional AA meetings, found an incredible supportive group at a specific meeting), but it can hamper the experience if you still use "other" drugs while claiming clean-time tokens (although it seems to be epidemic in the NA scene - lots of still full on users pretending to be clean, and plenty of shark-like dealers looking for easy targets).
There are other support groups that don't follow the AA/NA rules to a tee that can be helpful - if you have decent healthcare access, a counselor with an addiction background could be really helpful, and more understanding then some 12 step groups. I can use psychedelics, amphetamines, and benzos without going all out like I do with ANY opiate.
If I got a bottle of tramadol, I'd guzzle it down in no time - I have no self control with opiates - as soon as I start, i use it all day, every day, from the first day, until I can't get anymore by hook or by crook.
I can have a stash box with other drugs that won't be touched for weeks, but those damn opiates. I'm like one of those alcoholics that starts and can't stop, day/night/work/weekend whatever, I needed my fix (worked with plenty who had to have their breakfast beers, lunch beers, then blackout drink at night, every day).
I still remember getting my first bottle of Percs as a teenager, and all 20-30 were gone in about 2 days - I'd keep eating them even when I was puking (I somehow sickly enjoyed puking from too many opiates).
Told myself I'd never use a needle, a "phobia" of mine, at my worst I'd just pin my arm between my legs and poke over and over until I found a spot I hadn't ruined yet. I'd go to work every day with my cooker/filter/needles (long sleeve shorts no matter the heat)- it was insane and just about destroyed me and my family. I wish you luck, that next shot is NEVER worth it - I always found opiate addiction to be disappointing, depressing, and lonely.
My friends/family noticed a huge change in me when I relapsed although my own sick mind had myself convinced I was "normal" and "functional", when nothing could be further from the truth. I was depressed, dysfunctional, and slowly committing suicide, pushing away anyone who tried to expose my fake facade. I pushed some great people away, but many came back after I made an effort to get my shit straight.
It's not worth it (for many of us, anyway), if you have legitimate pain issues and non-opiate options don't work, more power to you. I pray I never have a need for opiate pain management. I already know it wouldn't work out.
One thing I found that helps is staying completely honest with yourself and your loved ones about cravings, and exercise. Even a light 20 minute workout a day can do wonders for cravings (they never really go away -I started over 20 years ago, with numerous lengths of time clean in between, and it still creeps up on me (I relapsed after a 5 year totally clean period) - find someone you can talk to about it - it really does help, fuck the self-consciousness - if someone rejects you because of your opiate addiction and your desire to nip it in the bud, they aren't worth your time.
And I'm sure there are plenty of other people out there that would take their time to help one in need. I get cravings, I usually hit my workout room, hit the weights, get my frustration out, then usually try to talk to close family/friend - it seems like its been working so far.
Being a junky was hard work, staying clean also takes hard work, but its so much more rewarding (the staying clean that is).
[3 Points] None:
Good going brother , fuck that shit .
[3 Points] seddes:
Keep up the good work man, its all in your head. Fuck H, life is so mucj better than this.
[3 Points] Iamtyu:
Hobbies are your friend. Guitar and bike riding for those restless nights are mine.
Keep it up bro, Heroin is a beast, once you get past the physical addiction and aren't sick every day life improves tenfold.
[3 Points] FlyDominum:
.
[3 Points] None:
Good luck bro, you've got this!
[3 Points] Technoligarch:
Stay strong brother. As open minded as I am about drugs, people who sell that sickness deserve some punches in the face.
[3 Points] type0null:
Save that last BTC. Take it as a sign and let it grow.
[3 Points] lemon_catgrass:
That's awesome man. Congrats on the 37 days. I'm about two months out from my last relapse (about 10 months out from rehab now, with only about one week's worth of accumulated days using in those 10 months). It gets better, and it gets easier. There are still days where the stress gets to me and I think "Is this really any better than using?", but it really is better. If you ever need to chat, feel free to shoot me a message.
[3 Points] CloudDrop:
Stay strong brother!
[3 Points] mrfloridamolly99:
Congrats, keep it up friend
[3 Points] spaceykayce:
And no more dope dick! I haven't had good sex in months
[3 Points] notrack1337:
Take this opportunity to become athletic, connect with positive friends, start a business, become an outstanding success, and be able to afford the next drug that's invented that's Heroin without the downsides.
[2 Points] DamnCoolCow:
Good for you my man.
[2 Points] swolemedic:
You didn't want dope that bad if AB going down is what kept you sober, remember that
[2 Points] MONEYCASHSHOES:
KEEP IT UP MAN!!!
[2 Points] EatSheets:
Pull through. Alcohol was my crutch. I hope you find a way to live a healthier lifestyle
[2 Points] None:
I just wanted to say I'm proud of you! Probably kind of creepy, but I have loads of respect for any addict who can stop. So hats off to you! Keep up the amazing work, you'll thank yourself later ❤😉
[1 Points] None:
[removed]
[1 Points] Astrology_:
Get some Kratom off dream or hansa mate, it's amazing for coming off of opiates I've heard.
[1 Points] RussIsTrash:
Wait Alphabay is gone ?????
[1 Points] avocado34:
/r/kratom can really help you out man. Plenty of people have switched over to kratom to change their lives for the better. Much cheaper than any other opiods. Good luck. Pm with questions about kratom
[1 Points] TreyWait:
Former Oxy add here. Not to be a dick or anything, but it's not as though AB was forcing you to buy junk. Ultimately the responsibility is your own. If the only reason you stopped is AB shutting down then you are going to have trouble.
[1 Points] Bossjeezy:
Lol
[1 Points] None:
90 days is a crossing point.
[1 Points] Lat3ris:
Hey man, congrats! You are able to actually HAVE A CHOICE about using now, and you wisely choose to stay away from that soul stealing shit. I have battled opiate addiction from the age of 15. I am now in my 30s and still struggling to let it go. Keep up the good mindset, you got this!
[1 Points] DNMuser5829:
i logged into my dnm throw away which tbh im not sure i have since SR1/2 Days to tell ya Good job man keep it up i have never done H only a blue here or there when i was a younger man. stay busy, stay strong, you & your life my friend are very much so worth it! :)
[1 Points] SchizophrenicTA:
Can't imagine the hell that is Heroin addiction. I regularly go on sugar binges and I can't even deal with that.
Dude wish you the best of luck.
[-1 Points] Scarred4lyfefromthis:
Yo im in your areqm come thru buuuuuuuuuddy
[-1 Points] elohssa82:
Got better shit on hansa.. go score man!!!
[-1 Points] NoSelfHelpBarb:
Get it, geeeeettt it. No but forreal, you got this brother
[-2 Points] None:
[deleted]
[-1 Points] comradepolarbear:
If you're about to break down use kratom. It will hold you over
[-2 Points] Vuvu785:
DMT is your last bet
[-5 Points] None:
[removed]
[-2 Points] tecman69:
Congratulations guy! Give your soul to Lord if you haven't already. Taking his hand is the only thing that saved me 34 years ago. Its easy to quit, harder to live free.
[-4 Points] cheapcab:
Try some 3-meo-pcp. It'll fix what ails ya.
[-5 Points] AllWhiteParty:
Cocaines better anyway.
Stay strong brother, it's worth it