Mendocinogreeno Half Pound

I stood nervously in my doorway as I saw the mailman across the street knowing he would be hitting my house soon. Little did he know that inside of his little toaster truck that he was carrying a half Lb of marijuana. And that he would be picking up the half Lb himself and personally handing it to me. I stood there laughing to myself at the thought of the mailman knowing what was inside but being unable to tear open the package with his grimy fingers to reach the prize for he would be committing a felony and would lose his job. He has no choice but to deliver the package, or else there will be ramifications. He slowly pulled up and opened the mailbox to drop the letters in. Then he opened his door and I knew he was going to walk up to me and hand me the package, containing the marijuana. Luckily this time I was prepared and stuffed a few paper towels in my asschecks beforehand because I knew I would end up shitting my pants at some point. He hands me the package and I take it and continue to laugh at myself, because little did the mailman know he just handed me a half pound. I take the box inside and slowly open the taped box. Inside I find a mylar bag that is about the same of 4 baseballs. I rip open and mylar, and just as it tears I accidentally ended up shitting my pants (unfortunately a type #6 turd fluffy mushy pieces with ragged edges), but I have learned to be prepared. Luckily I had paper towels stuffed between my ass checks but, being a type #6 turd and the force at which the turds exited, a lot of it just dripped town the towel and ruined my underwear. In order to void the room of the poop smell I tore open remainder of the package and the room was filled with a sweet smell of blackberry kush. I sat down and began to tear apart the nugs into jars so they could breath. I filled up a total of 6 mason jars. I went outside with a rolled joint and began to smoke. upon inhaling a hit I thought I smelled a odd skunky/shit smell which is abnormal for blackberry kush. Then I remembered I shit my pants and had to clean up so I went inside. Because I had sat down with a type #6 turd in my pants, a thin layer of shit seemed to have cooked/crusted over between the paper towel and my ass checks (like a pancake on a flat top grill) as a result of all the heat. I'm sure hot farts assisted in the cooking/warming over of the poop sheet. After using a fork as a scraper to clean my ass I went back outside to finish the joint. The joint smoked pretty well, I'd say this strain was on par with the Afgani. As with all of mendos marijuana, a lot of the buds are really fat (3-4 gram nugs).I do have one request from mendo though, he would express ship some type of adult diaper or heavy soaking paper towels with my orders in the future because I always end up shitting my pants before and or during the opening of the seal. The day the package arrives it's always too late for me to run to the store and get some because I like to look at the mailman deliver my package, personally.

I'd upload pics but I gotta clean up


Comments


[5 Points] weedandsyrup:

Other guys story was better. Jerome was a fool.


[2 Points] None:

11/10


[1 Points] None:

[deleted]

What is this?