Quantiks Xanax bars warped me into the future

Time Traveling Pills. Yes you fucking heard me correctly. Time Thefuck Traveling pills. Who has them you may ask? QUANTIK

I am no Shill, these shits are legits

Okay so at first I thought I was just ordering some cool pharmaceutical everyone on the web has been talking about Appleprazom I believe? So i buy some of Quantiks awesome quadrapacked Bars, and forrealz I took like 16 at the same time on CHRISTMAS EVE and guess the fuck what, the last thing I remember is from fucking yesterday! I have always had a good memory. I actually got awarded for the first one to remember all my times tables up to 12x12 in the 4th grade so i'm pretty sure this was legit time travel. I am DEAD ASS SERIOUS, just take a few of his Xanax Bars and the next thing you will know, it will be 5-9 days into the future. Clearly Quantik is more than just a chemist, he's an engineer who created a time warping agent.

In laws coming for the week? That's fine, just fast forward the fuck outta there

Tough upcoming week at work? Quantiks your man

Don't feel like dealing with your children as babies? This one might require you take like 40 or something, but like i said #shitsRlegits

Source: Click


Comments


[63 Points] upsidedownsyndrom:

lol this is fuckin retarded god damn


[31 Points] octomarvel:

The 7 Steps of Time Travel.

  1. Take 30 Xanax.
  2. Blackout.
  3. Fuck mother in law on dinner table while singing we will rock you.
  4. Wake up in between father in law n mother in law smoking a cigarette in their bed.
  5. Post a positive review on reddit while tripping over your own feet.
  6. Look at calendar for the future.
  7. Hoverboard to Biffs.

=)


[20 Points] None:

[deleted]


[21 Points] Idontusexanax:

Side effect of xanax-assisted warp time travel is a considerable probability of also warping space, landing you into a jail cell.


[16 Points] Fugustatement:

I wish I took some before reading this post


[14 Points] None:

[deleted]


[10 Points] Lolsteroids:

"Vendor review"??

more like "Humor"

Time travelling bars making you black the fuck out for weeks. LOL

Appleprazom LOL


[6 Points] somebodygoneride:

this is stupid af


[6 Points] AstraPharmaceuticals:

I feel you 100%


[3 Points] topknotch89:

omg i had a good laugh.


[3 Points] unkz:

I don't understand why someone would want this. Life so bad you'd rather not be part of it?


[2 Points] now_its_a_dick_joke:

Welp. That's enough internet for one day.

TL:DR? Newbie scarfs down 16 "xanax" and blacks out for a few weeks. Hopefully it sterilized him.


[2 Points] None:

Was this his special edition Delorean flux capacitor bars?????


[2 Points] AliceInSwitzerland:

I'm assuming this is the reason people have been warning me about benzos.


[1 Points] None:

Whats12x12? Prove this skill


[1 Points] None:

144 niggas ;) and omg best stor6 of the day. Lol he said time traveling bars.


[1 Points] JburnaDNM:

Yooooooo. Hahaha. Only if I had these time traveling xanaxs. The in law part hahaha. Genius.


[1 Points] Chardlz:

Quantik, I see your grammar skills have improved considerably :)


[1 Points] Gompelonza:

You had me at "dont feel like dealing with your children as babies" lol.


[1 Points] None:

appleprazom lol i almost shot whiskey through my nose


[1 Points] Dnm_cunt:

Glad you survived. I used to wake up 7 days later with broken noses, in jail cells, made a complete dick of myself and lost everything!

Watch yourself boi!


[0 Points] throwawayk5zq47j6wd3:

Quantik's bars transported me into the future and in jail :P


[0 Points] C0nnman:

You shouldn't be buying pills on the Internet you don't even know the name of. Appleprozam? Really?


[-1 Points] The_Literal_Grinch:

vendor review

this is the same old shit, it ain't even new

whew, whew. goes OP as he breaks through

its next week when he comes to

mission control calling the ground crew

they might let this squeak through

i dont think this review is something to live up to

fuck all that shit, take some bars with you to the zoo

see some lions and penguins try to eat human stew

fall into the deep, dark blue

nothing but polar bears now all around you.

boo-hoo