I got the fucking scare of my life last night.

Let me give you a little background on myself. I've been around these parts of the dark web for not a very long time, it has just been a few months. I have never done any type of drug in my life aside from a xanax bar or two and I have never smoked weed. The only thing I do is drink! My presence here has one sole motive: Getting pussy.

I've learned over the years that being ugly as shit doesn't really help getting laid, and having a lot of money doesn't help much either. But you know what really gets these bitches twisted? Bars and molly. Damn I have bought some shit off the dark web and seriously show up to parties like a fucking king pin. Having bitches beggg me for free bars and molly and I let them know what they have to do to get it. (Seriously I got my dick sucked last night for two bars and two molly! Total out of pocket cost: $5.25!) It helps being in the company of notorious sluts. So basically the past month or two I've had a significant number of hook ups and shit has been pretty decent.

But then last night came. Fuck. It really rained on my parade and it scared me shitless. Me and my bartard "friend" (I just chill with him because he lures in the girls initially) pick up two girls to go hang out at my place for the nights. Long story short I'm in-between moving residences so I have some items in my car including my safe that I keep a few hundred bars and ~40 grams of molly in. Well as we finish up with the girls (8 A.M. at this point) I am taking them home and one of the girls states that she's going to check in with her parents, pretending she had been asleep all night, and then proceed to tell them she's going out with friends.

So we drop her off and wait for her to come back out. I'm just waiting bored as hell because I am going to drop them all back off at one place then go home and sleep because I was tired as shit. Well as we are waiting a cop car pulls up. Then another, and another. I freak the living fuck out because I have my safe in there. They surround me and come tap on my window. In this moment I think that I'm busted. The fucking feeling in my stomach was indescribable. If I get caught, fuck this shit. I'm blowing my brains out before I go to prison for multiple years.

I figured they were going to assume I had been drinking or something and ask me to step out and investigate us or some shit. The dumbasses I was with were bared out and had some molly still on them. I was sober (As I was only trying to get pussy, not party) but cops can be aggressive and shit. He briefly looked around my car and was sniffing HARD. Thank god I don't allow anyone to smoke in my fucking car or that would have been "probable cause" and I would be fucked.

The cop then just mildly explained to us that someone had saw the girl jump the fence, sneaking back into her own house, and assumed they were breaking in. Oh . thank christ. They said we are free to go and were just glad no break in was happening. Damn dude. I have never been so scared shitless. Bottom line I'm completely reevaluating life right now.


Comments


[11 Points] None:

But you know what really gets these bitches twisted? Bars and molly.

Wow you sound like a charmer. Your attitude to both women and even your friends is... Repulsive. Never before have I been disappointed in one of these stories for the OP to not get in trouble.


[5 Points] ass_lick:

My presence here has one sole motive: Getting pussy.

Sorry guys, I should have been more tame in my language that highly offended everyone. Let me rephrase in a way most of you will understand and be comfortable with.

My presence here has one sole motive: Witty banter and persuading m'ladys


[4 Points] samwhiskey:

Two Molly? Slow down playa


[4 Points] tailsjoin:

You are a hypocrite: buying drugs online to get laid, and then talking about these women like their less than you or subhuman. You sound lame as shit dude.


[2 Points] ILoveSiracha:

Dude, you talk like a highschooler , no wonder you have such a hard time getting pussy.


[2 Points] None:

[deleted]


[1 Points] Theeconomist1:

being ugly as shit doesn't really help getting laid, and having a lot of money doesn't help much either

Ah irony, panties drop for bars but not cash. Who are these fuckwads?

How old are these chicks??? Having to explain to their parents where they are and shit?


[1 Points] Rolling_Stonedd:

You sound like a cock.


[1 Points] Bvcxdjkki:

What's with all the hate? It's not like this guy is date raping the girls.


[1 Points] NASBNJ1992:

Username checks out. You should probably blow your brains out just because


[1 Points] yalldontknowjack:

You realize you can just buy them? You don't have to buy drugs. Woman take cash or credit.


[1 Points] Jizzlyfaway:

Well, ass licker, it's too bad you didn't get fucked in the ass by the cops or your potential fellow convicts - you sexist piece of shit.

You're a real dick weed, if you didn't get the message by now.


[1 Points] redditulousfun:

People like you are why i add blue food colouring to my g before selling it


[1 Points] sillysally11:

Man do you ever come off as a douche bag.


[1 Points] 2005C:

damn close call! keep your shit clean sonny.


[1 Points] None:

Wow you sound like a real wanker when I dealt speed I never considered the women I slept with as sluts you have issues.


[1 Points] thatskank:

brosef i think people are just generally upset it's so often bartard voices like this that come off as the face of the drug using community, and some people, many using dnms since they're inception, and we're just like jesus it's people like you and stories like this that keep the mandatory minimums in place and people behind bars and cops hunting these sites... and we connect our palms to our faces..


[0 Points] None:

You...you are one pathetic human being....

I honestly hope you get busted and go to prison. You'll love getting the bitches fucked up inside those walls