THE TRUTH ABOUT AG/BTCFOG!!! NOW STOP ASKING!!!

btcfog was like the bigshot high school football player and agora was the chick in high school who was pretty but noone really noticed cause she was nerdy and dressed kinda nerdy never wore. here's the story.

one day, btcfog's friends dared him to go out on a date with agora as a joke. she said yes and was excited and when btcfog arrived at agora's door, agora made herself up real good and lookin' super fine -- no trace of that nerdy chick anywhere. it was like love at first site for btcfog, but wasn't because he saw her before. agora always had that effervescent personality that made her more beautiful than what her physical appearance made her alone and as with most girls, she was a talker, but not in a bad way. as their date went on btcfog thought agora had it all: the looks, the smarts, a kindness that chick this hot don't have, and a reasonable business plan...errr goals in life. agora thought btcfog was very handsome and he was the bigshot football star afterall. what started out as a joke on btcfogs part turned into a serious relationship. they dated for a while and she got to hang out with the cool crowd and became popular. she cared about her looks more than before but never really changed as a person. but the longer they dated there were things he did that she didn't like. he was too immature, didn't want to grow up, didnt have a plan for his future, he was dishonest with her, and flirted with other markets...errr girls. he thought he was gonna be a bigshot his whole life and did whatever the fuck he wanted. she stuck with him hoping he could change -- hoping she could change him -- because she saw potential in him. as time passed, he never did and they had lots of other problems in there relationship. she confided in her longtime friend laguerre polynomials -- he was her shoulder to cry on -- whenever he had problems with btcfog. agora and laguerre have been friends since childhood. growing up they the best of friends, hanging out everyday and totally inseparable. from the time school let out until dinner time, there was always an adventure to be had. they both grew up poor, but that didn't put any limits on how much fun they had together. their imaginations took them from the depths of the sea to the edge of the universe (and beyond that one time...scary shit). he was smart too, just like her. together, they won events at the national science olympiad annually and were planning on going to cal tech together. they were like two peas in a pod. he was always in love with her too and she felt the same, and truth be told, they were meant and made for each other. but neither told the other their true feelings -- the tragedy of being shy. but one day, the hormones kicked in and it gave laguerre enough courage to ask agora out. he was going to do it -- he was going to tell her how he feels when they met up after school to study. but she never came. that night, giddy and excited and with that happiness in her voice (the one girls get when they are in love) she tells laguerre about being asked out by btcfog. his heart is broken. he distances himself off from the world a little bit more and just focuses on his studies and figuring out a way to change the world. but he's there for agora when she needs him...always have been and always will be. fast forward to college, agora and laguerre are at cal tech and both are cs majors and both are still best friends. agora is still with btcfog. he decided to move to california to become an actor and worked as a waiter when not on auditions. he was still the same guy from high school without any real goals and convinced that doing the same shit he's always done will make him successful. agora knew better and was finally ready to dump btcfog. she outgrew him and she's known it for a long time. he became the person who people see and think that that person may have been popular at one point and tried to ride that wave they caught in high school even after that wave hit the shoreline back in high school...you know what I'm talking about? anyways, she broke up with him and he did not take it well at all and things got violent (domestically). btcfog came at her and was ready to lay her out. because btcfog is now a fat slob and agora stayed in shape, agora did her krav maga on his ass. bruised and bloodied, btcfog moved out that day to a little basement studio apartment in LA. he walks with a limp and to this day he tells people the limp is from saving an old lady who was getting robbed by a gang of black thugs. they beat him up real good, but he knocked a few on their asses. he works as a dishwasher at del taco now -- so he says. agora and laguerre did start dating and are as happy as ever -- letting their imaginations take them from the depths of the sea to the edge of the universe and beyond. laguerre asked agora to marry him and she said yes. they are currently on their honeymoon and will be back soon with something big. speaking of big, laguerre is HUUUNNNGGG!!! anyways, when agora returns she will be better than ever and everything will be right with the world again because she is with the right guy.

Update: btcfog did find an acting job and became a sensation. it started when he answered an ad looking for "male talent." he did not like it at first and cried after shooting his first scene, but he was intent on being great. and he did. he created his own genre/niche in the industry -- limping fat slobs getting reamed anally by giant horse dick -- and he became the king of it. who knew people were into that shit. but he grew to love his job and that is all that matters folks, so don't be judging.


Comments


[52 Points] Aluminum_Foil_Hat:

What vendor did you get your meth from?


[19 Points] sinn0304:

Meth. It's one hell of a drug.


[13 Points] cactuzx:

Do you really expect me to read through that essay? Fucking tweaker


[8 Points] 27clubhereicome:

Separated paragraphs are important.


[7 Points] WarmNights:

LOL-DNR


[3 Points] Moridakkuboka:

nice flair


[2 Points] dawgiee:

Lol. 'Meth'


[5 Points] BobArctor_007:

I should collect all these posts and publish a DNM fanfiction book. It would make me rich!


[3 Points] theevoinsider:

TLDR, here's the agora BitFog connection -

Agora paid for advertising on BitFog, end of story, Evo paid for advertising on bitcoin forums, no-one gets their knickers in a twist over that


[3 Points] None:

wat is paragraf


[1 Points] GrandMasta216:

Best tale ever told!


[1 Points] PingPlay:

Apologies, I couldn't see your point through that wall of typography.


[1 Points] Rolltripdance:

I could picture this entire thing in my head the whole time.


[1 Points] operativac:

Noce read, a have a smile on face


[1 Points] Theeconomist1:

Wow. This is long. And this is coming from me. I am long. And now A bit envious.