Hi, I am going to hire an escort to complete my transition from nerd to gangster (hey, I have the drugs, this is the only thing I am missing).
Now hiring an escort seems to me like a major opsec issue. Meeting up with a criminal you have met over the internet seems like... a stupid choice. But my testosterone ultimately will win, so I might as well do this without losing my virginity to Jose.
Here's my plan:
Use an online service purchased with bitcoins over tor to make a phone call to my escort, or buy a burner phone. Each seems like they have their own drawbacks. Which one should I choose?
Next I am going to meet up with her in public. I am thinking about a public place, that is not busy like a restaurant in the middle of nowhere, with very few customers. I will get there about 3 hours in advanced (presumably before the police arrive if its a trap), and if I see no suspicious activity (large surge in "customers", etc) I will approach her.
Next, I will bring her to my rented hotel (making sure I am not being tailed) where I will ask her to give me a striptease (it is legal to pay a girl to get nude, right?), the way I see it, is that no undercover cop would actually get nude for me. After that I guess I will ask her to have sex with me.
Do you guys think I should invest in a police radio to get counter intelligence on enemy activity?
Does my plan sound good?
sounds good. two things though:
1) before you bang her, make sure to eat her out. that way if it's a cop you will know because she won't let you do it. assplay is a must. your face should look like the aftermath of a photoshoot for a Hershey's commercial.
2) make sure NOT to wear a condom. if you do, they might take it out of the trashcan and use it as evidence against you in court. nut inside her too. an undercover would never let you do that.