www.youtube.com/watch?v=425GpjTSlS4
Hours crawl by like slugs. T minus how long has it been? The Wait makes reality lose meaning. Everything in life is only a distraction from waiting until that envelope finds its final resting place.
It starts when you hit confirm, and start refreshing the order page waiting to see how fast the vendor will accept it. I get dismayed when they aren't hot out the gate, but I realize that I'm being a little unreasonable. Vendors are human.
But like all humans, they can be subject to greed and hypocrisy. Who knows if this time YOU will be scammed? This wait leaves only questions.
Watching the sunrise on that 3rd day- what a feeling (unless that's an express order you're waiting on: FUCK). Having kept you awake for the past 36 hours, your aching joints perhaps finally decide to give you a small rest. They know that right around the stroke of the eleventh hour on this blessed day, all will become right with the world. The postman will arrive.
Please, for the love of god, Mr. Postman, look and see, is there a letter in your magic bag for me?
While I wait I make music based around the sound of my mailbox squeaking open and banging shut. Kinda a synth funk/noise sorta thing.
But sometimes you get up to this new uncertain day with luck on your side. Well, lucky that your chosen vendor is a pro, and they somehow get that priority envelope to you 2nd day. Holy moly what joy!
The wait is intense. It has driven itself deep within my psyche. Sometimes I get nervous and order backup from another vendor, and as soon as I do, the first has marked it shipped. Waiting will make you foolish if you aren't careful.
There are a few things to mitigate the roaring echo of the clock's second hand rocking against the inside of your skull. Weed is great obviously if you have some of that. Movies pass the time decently. Also carefully considering the fact that you're spending precious moments of your short miserable life on this earth literally watching time pass on a clock, or in my case, cars going by on the road, instead of creating something, or being productive in general. Keeping that thought in mind, and doing something about it will help pass the time.
Going to work. Going for a bike ride. Taking a shower. Looking at yourself in the mirror. Taking note of the weight you've lost, but somehow seeming not healthy. Drawing the curtains. Curling up in bed. Take a look at the clock again.
Please, Mr. Postman, please, Mr. Postman, please, please, Mr. Post. Man.
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