I like writing, even though I'm not that great at it. I find it quite a stress reliever and distraction. So I thought I'd tell a story, and dedicate it to BBMC. This is not exactly the best opsec, but I never have more than personal on me (since giving up CA), and would never get more than a caution for my few g's. However, please don't speculate which u/ this could be, as it really could be any of us (maybe not the stupid one's), so the u/ is irrelevant really. Shit just happens sometimes... I just thought I'd pay a little tribute with a mammoth methpost for old time's sake.
So, I got some meth in for one of the very few times I've used it in months. I live quite far away from my old friends and family, and my working hours can be odd so when my social life clashes a bit there aren't enough hours in the day. This has been one of those weekends...
I bought some bud off teflondon, and was gonna write a review as I'd thought I'd give a little back to the fantastic community. I bought the G13 and the LSD. When it turned up, the LSD was really quite beautiful. I have had some great bud recently, but the smell of it was intoxicating. For the first time in ages, I haven't had a chance to smoke over the weekend, and had to wait until today. Pure torture! I was burping that shit 5 times a day! I was genuinely shocked on the first toke. Packs one hell of a punch. The high lasts long too. That LSD is even a grade above the BerryHaze I bought off TopShott105 the other week. I have a pic of that too I think,
My current gf or I usually cook after smoking, and today it was her turn. She stood up, got 3ft round the sofa, and, "Oh no, this one's not for walking", (no real tolerance, bless her). I felt nice, peaceful and relaxed for the first time in days, free of pain and a great feeling running all through my body.
Well, I couldn't be arsed to cook, and it was her turn. So I just sat there and drifted off a bit. She couldn't be arsed either, so we just ate a huge fucking crab, some mayo, salad, bread etc.
I started thinking about BBMC being busted. That led me to think about the first time I was busted, and before I knew it all the times alcohol or drugs had influenced my life in some way came flooding back to me. I don't think I've ever considered it as I've never had a dependence or craving (apart from the time I was clucking after being silly).
The reason I wanna dedicate it to him [if he's guilty] is that I think he's a great example of a huge flaw in the war on drugs. Yes, he blathers on occasionally, but no matter how many times he's baited or insulted he always rises above it. He's practically the mascot for the ideal principles and positives of the markets, and a heavy advocate for fair play.
Here's the flaw though. The drug he supposedly manufacture is one of the most exclusive and expensive in Europe / g. Yes, drugs affect poor communities, but what is the reason poor communities are the most affected? [You know where I'm going with that one]. However, would poor people really buy at that price? No way! Would kids? Nah. Most likely, just normal people, getting through life and having fun in between paying their taxes while keeping their noses clean. I consider myself to be one of those people.
I was gonna go to bed, but I thought it'd be more fun and appropriate for me to end my long weekend by finishing the last bit of meth I have, and blather on about the (almost) Complete History of my use of drugs, and the affects they've had on my personal life. I'm in an industry that has a rep for drugs (what doesn't) and if I went into all that too, it'd be too long, too ridiculous and too doxing.
Naturally I'll start at the beginning, with money, as you can't have drugs without money. I went to a decent school and had decent grades. At 16 I got a part time job while at school. Since then, I've always had a job. I've never robbed, scammed or stolen. During that time, 16 was old enough to get in pubs. I'd go out most weeks with my mates, but the repetition and right-offs of weekends was starting to get boring. My town is known as being a bit of a shit hole, and the constant posturing and fighting outside was really putting me off. Then I witnessed a bouncer almost crack someone's skull open against the pavement, offered to witness (snitch, I know, but it was well out of order!), and was basically shoed away by the police. At that point I decided I needed to find a new weekend past time.
I started hanging around with weed smokers instead. We'd only smoke on the weekends, practically every, at one of our houses, whoever's was 'free'. We would play Pro Evo, watch WWF, and play cards. Sometimes someone would have a party, and we'd do E and let go a bit. Kids stuff basically. Then my first spot happened. We were going to a party that night. Me and a friend who lived nearby went to smoke a joint on a field on the way there. We had a little corner bit that was hidden, but overlooked by a couple of houses. This was in the middle of the night with no one there. Occasionally when we'd be there a woman would come out and give us the stink-eye. We just ignored it peacefully. That night 2 cops had the incredible intuition to walk down to that secluded part of the field. I had some pre-rolls and the pills on me for me and him. They found the pre-rolls and I got a brutal cuffing and shove that the other officer actually told him off when they were outside the car and I was in the back. They then found the pills at the station. Luckily I only had 4, but they kept telling me I was a dealer. I made a stupid mistake of telling them I was going to a party with school friends. I now know what you're actually supposed to say now. I was 16 at the time.
A few hours later, they charge me with intent to supply too. The motherfuckers raided my parents' house and I hadn't a clue. They found about a q, a few more pre-rolls, one or two pills, and some used baggies. They kept telling me I had a business selling pre-rolls. I didn't, I just don't wanna waste a roll rolling. They bailed me and I went home to face the music, only there wasn't any. My parents refused to talk about it, anything, or look me in the eye.
Here's where the mistake comes in, I get to school, and the motherfuckers had asked the school to search my locker cos they suspected me of dealing. The school let them, but they found nothing.
No details here, but I was a bit naughty, and found a practical use for something cheap that was stocked at my work, so I stole a few. They were on me at arrest. I get into work, and it happens again. The motherfuckers could tell there's no reason for someone to buy that, even if they could. They obviously found my payslips in my room and got to my boss.
As the school had a bit of drug drama at the time, it was made clear to me that if I didn't leave quietly I would be expelled, so I left. My boss and his boss had a meeting with me. Tbf, I think they found it a little funny, and the only thing they asked me was, "Do you use any IV drugs?" I said no, and they let me stay working there. When I went to answer bail, they dropped the intent and offered a caution. I took it.
The only other decent school around was over an hours' bus ride each way, with no traffic, and it was a bit shit tbh. My grades started to fall as I would be so tired from all the long days. As I had pretty much been scared off drugs, I went back to my other pisshead mates. I'm quite impulsive, and used to not think things through properly. One night I drove with the intention of only having a couple. I had 4, and a mate suggested we go to some party, but it's far. I fucking disgracefully made the terrible and selfish decision to drive. I got about 2 miles and got pulled over, breathalysed and suspended for 6 months. I had only had my license for a few months. It was in the local paper and the family found out.
As my grades were shit, I decided to cut my losses and go full time. I had to leave my other job cos it was too far, and entered into a dead end job. I was there for years, and we used to get pissed every Friday, always paid for. One boss was a proper partier, used to go to The Cross every weekend and come to work on Monday fucked as anything. This week we go to London, and one of the reps was with us and he's huge. He was a bit of a cock to me sometimes, but that night he passed out like a light-weight. That was when I started to brag to my boss about how I could outdrink him too. Great fucking idea!
He orders a double tequila oc. I neck it, and I'm proud. Too fucking smug, so he buys another! Uh oh. I neck that too. At that point I couldn't really speak, so we left the bar area to rejoin the others, and I start doing the "dope-fiend-lean" you may have seen on The Corner. This is my cue to leave before I pass out. I get outside and the fresh air fucks my face. Somehow I find the station and get on a tube. Fuck knows which one. The next thing I know I'm being shook. It's a tube guy telling me it's finished and to get off. I'm walking through the tube shitting it, no money for a taxi, fuck knows where in London, and so pissed I can barely walk or talk. I get to the exit lean against the wall.
A couple of workers are there chatting and one asks me to leave. I said no cos I wanna go home. Basically saying a load of stupid shit to let me stay and hide. One says leave or I'm making you. I say no, and he grabs me by both arms and we struggle. Another grabs me from behind and I fall backwards on him. At that point I went completely limp and was just asking them to let me go. I wasn't freaking out or anything, and if I seemed aggressive it wasn't intentional. I was just scared =( About a minute later I was being pulled up, by a police officer. I was arrested for assault.
I told them what happened, and they said I came at the guy. The other guy was backing it up. They claimed to have CCTV, but that never appeared of course. 1 pisshead vs 2 workers... The guy behind me gashed his arm, and was off on sick leave for a few weeks with "stress". I went to court and stupidly didn't hire a solicitor, and got a shit duty one instead. Because of my past indiscretions, I received the maximum electronic tag you can get, 6 months. He said the next time it was prison. I kept the whole thing secret from my parents. The first they knew was when someone came to fit the tag. On a related note, they check you every few weeks, but don't give a fuck about basic etiquette, such as knocking on doors before entering. I sleep au natural baby, and have done since I was 6.
I didn't go out for a fair bit after that as I got quite low. I bought a computer and played a shit load of games. One day my best mate persuaded me to go to the pub cos no one had seen me for ages. I go there (pre my 7pm curfew) and of course everyone starts asking about my tag. I ain't no chav, and it was highly embarrassing for me. Unfortunately (again) some dick from my middle school was there who I hadn't seen in years. He had a 'hard brother' so talked the most shit out of anyone I'd ever known. He latched onto me and started goading, hard! It takes a lot for me to lose my temper and I practically begged him to stop. As always, no one else gets involved. They just watch.
He crosses the line and I lashed out with a jab to his face. He falls back into his mates and they push him back at me and he misses a couple of times, and grabs my neck scratching it like a bitch. We're ordered out the pub and leave peacefully. The landlady follows us out and I go to shake his hand so we can get back in cos she's cool. He refused so we weren't let back in. A few hours later the police arrive at my house, but I'm not there, I'm sulking in the park. My parents order me out when I get home.
At this point I don't know wtf to do. I was crashing anywhere I could, as I still had a bit of money and was working. The police get my mobile number and tell me there's a warrant and to turn myself in. No fucking way I'm going to prison, so I hide. I go house to house. I knew my parents were going on holiday so I let myself in. At this point I had my license back and was stupid enough to park my registered car in the drive. They came to the door. At that point, I was super pissed and had had enough. What I did was so ridiculous it's unbelievable. Some of you may have read it somewhere.
I end up arrested and bailed again. I go into hiding again, waiting for one of my mates to convince this cunt to be honest, but his pride is too important, despite being a snitch. After they started hammering my parents' door at 3am a few times cos they didn't know what else to do, my parents tell me to come home and face the music. I hand myself in and they slap on a few more charges and I'm bailed to appear in court. The prick didn't turn up and I got off.
Through it all, a girl I knew was a real comfort. Now I'm fucking on the regular and out of trouble. Then I get made redundant cos of the financial crash! It turned out to be a blessing in disguise, cos my gf really pushed me into taking a chance and after some heavy persuasion, I went for it. It was hard at first (understatement), but I hung in there. My partner went to uni and got a first. When she got back she moved in with me and my parents and we started saving for a house. I was raking it in at that time, paying minimal rent and spending fuck all cos I wasn't going out. Plus I was making cash on the side importing DVD's and selling them on ebay, buying launch consoles to flip etc. After a couple of years we had enough money to buy a place and we did. It was so big the stuck up agent refused to show us unless we proved we had the cash, as he couldn't believe 1st time buyers could afford it.
I owe that girl a lot, maybe even my life. Even though I screwed her over in the end, we still talk like mates. Then circumstances happened. My partner went away for a few weeks leaving me on my own. I started freaking out about the next step, kids. When she came back it felt weird. Then a friend of hers came back from Oz and asked to stay for a week. She stayed for a month, and I couldn't stand it, but bared it cos I knew my gf loved her, although that was before she turned into a loudmouthed Sheila. We drifted even further apart, and weren't really talking anymore. I took some shrooms one day, and realised what I'd already known. She was lovely, and a good influence, but she was nothing like me. She wasn't a prude, she was very generous;-) We just became strangers after only a few months of making one of the biggest purchases I'll ever make.
Rather than say anything, I tried to carry on, only I started drinking when I got home. I used to look forward to going to work, cos there was this ice cold sexy smouldering girl there who actually started to open up to me, as did I to her. One small problem, she was engaged too. Once it was on the table the friction was unbearable. About a day later she bent over a shelf and I grabbed her by the waist. She was all over me, but we got fucking caught by the cleaner straight away, who blabbed to everyone. We couldn't stop seeing eachother, as we were drawn like moths to flames. She's from a completely different culture, but holds pretty much the same values and has few inhibitions. To say we egged eachother on is an understatement (sex I mean=). This caused major problems with rumours etc, so I left. The place went to shit so she left too. We started to earn even better money though, as we were both now managers. This is where I'm gonna skip a load of shit as it's way too long.
One day, I go to a football match. My friend and I were outside the local to the stadium. Some chavs squared up (like 12v2), but police saw and got in between. I recognised one of the officers =( They were ordered to leave, and we left shortly after. My friend and I got jumped by at least 6, but they were smal little punks and I fought them off fine without actually landing anything. Next thing I'm oblique kicked from behind. Thinking it's another chav I spin round and narrowly managed to pull back a punch to an officer's face. Arrested again, in the back of a van. Ticket paid for already! Of course, the police that recognised me tags along and goads me all the way. They keep me for 12 hours with no interview and bail me. I'm to go to court, AGAIN!
I tell my friend he has to be my witness but he refuses saying he doesn't wanna get arrested. Let's just say at that point I had more important issues to deal with than relationships with friends, so I made him an offer he couldn't refuse. He did turn up, but the case was thrown out in minutes after the judge discovered these shits who attacked me came miles without tickets just to cause trouble. CPS was ordered to apologise. Did they fuck? Policeman in full uniform outside to be a witness. I just smile, and he says, "next time".
I'd had enough. I started spending all my time with this other girl, pouring my heart out. I couldn't talk to my fiancée. She started to sense us failing and started to try to impress me, but I just felt guilty af as it was so obvious. One day she just basically took my cock and we did it. First and only time I pretended to come. The next day I was devastated, I felt I cheated on my gf with my fiancée. My head was fucked up and I was really drinking a lot to hide it. I make such great decisions (/s), and one afternoon alone I partake in about 10g's of cubes. At that point it was obvious what I had to do. I left my fiancé and sold her my half the house, and moved in with my new partner straight away cos I was in the shit yet again.
Of course, this decision was far from light. It tormented me with guilt for months. I was scared my new partner's attraction was just primal and temporary. I was wrong. It was the ballsiest decision I'd ever made in my life, and we both made huge sacrifices to be together. We decided to move away, cos of the police issue, and for just a fresh start in general. Now we're as happy as can be. If she's not the one, there's no such thing. Even my mates commented how similar she is to me. She's funny af, but in a teasing kinky way, not whorey. Blokes absolutely love her, but women hate her. After about 7 years now we're still mixing things up. We started off like that, like raw fire. Cos we couldn't go to hers or mine at that time we went anywhere. Car after work, fields, woods, everywhere.
We had now moved and I suggested going to Dam to celebrate. We went and she smoked for the first time. She took 3 pulls and said she felt nothing. Surprised, I said take one more, and fair play to her, she sucked in about a 1/3rd of the joint hahaha. Cue her tripping balls for 3 hours after we manage to get back to the hotel. Put her off a bit, but she tried more and wasn't as bad.
I had got quite sick of drinking and drowning my sorrows, plus my gf didn't like it cos her ex was an alchi and an abuser. I always did love weed though. It wasn't hard to find a dealer where I was, took one question to one person haha. Weighed, and on point, I started smoking again, and she began to enjoy it too. She loves the woods and I suggested shrooms, but I fucked up and let her eat them on a full stomach. By the time she was tripping it was 4 hours later and we were back at home. She was getting confused, and we decided phychs weren't for her.
Ok, so I'm a bad influence, and my naiive formerly communistically suppressed gf is up for trying anything as she'd never had so much freedom or money before. I suggested we try E instead. Since that 1st time it's been a by-monthly thing. I'll spare the details or you might blush, so I tell you how the first roll started. Chilling watching Plannet Earth or such. She's too fucked to appreciate it so asks for music. I usually listen to Bob Marley in these situes, but she don't like that, or my 90's rap. I'd just been hearing bout dat boy The Weeknd, and I download House of Baloons. I'm just sat there minding my own business, and she starts stroking my neck all of a sudden. Skipping the details, if you haven't tried sex on e, you're missing out on a mind-blowing experience.
Then, IT happened. I can't go into details much, but I was involved in a serious fucking motorbike accident. If I told you what happened, it could be a doxx, cos I bet hardly anyone would survive that, let alone receive no broken bones or serious injuries. I was just fucked up. You know where handle bars are in relation to balls? That was the main brunt. No walking for me for a couple of weeks. So, as I'm flying through the air I went limp, honestly just resigned to my fate and as calm as anything. I shit you not!
After a few seconds, or minutes, fuck knows, I hit the floor. I managed to rotate and landed on my neck rolling onto my back. I flopped like a rag-doll. It was weird, cos for a few seconds I couldn't tell if I was dead or alive. Then I realised, as the crippling pain raged through my body. But this is a fast stretch of road at night, and I'm in the lane. I'm watching the taxi 40m down the road. Takes a while, but he turns around and parks on the verge next to me. I'm shouting, "Help me", etc, and the cunt wouldn't even look at me! Next think I know I see a car from afar, as it's a long straight. I start pointing at the car and he still don't budge. I swear to god, that fucking car didn't slow down 1mph, and it took everything I had to throw myself into the central reserve, at which point I pass out.
When I wake up I'm surrounded by people. "Don't let him go", were my first words. I hear a sheepish, "I'm here". Yeah, cheers mate! Long story short, I got a letter through the post saying he had to take a one day awareness course. My faith in the police starts to wane, just a tad.
Ok, so I'm off work for quite a while, about a month but I still can't move properly. All I've had is some co-codamol from the hospital, and the same and anti-inflams from the GP. Why I didn't get them 1st I have no idea, cos all my appendages were double in size. I couldn't even get off the sofa to use the toilet. After a couple of bs NHS physio session I give up. 3 months later I start to get serious upper back pain. It was so bad I was hunching over the steering wheel on the way home to stretch it out, and needed to wait before I could sit down on the sofa with any level of comfort. I rang the insurance, and they admitted they fucked up and sent me for tests and private physio straight away.
In the mean time I went to the doctors for pain. Nothing he was giving me was doing shit. He puts me on tramadol and still nothing. I told him I had to take 6 and alcohol to sleep. Oops, no more prescription, now I need therapy apparently. After 2 sessions I realised it wasn't for me and left it. The pain was still there though, hard.
I start to research pain drugs on the net. That's when I first discover the dnms. My first buy is weed, and it's better than local, so I try some ex. Amazing. Ok, but that's not what I'm here for. I'd love to buy the legit tabs, but they're so expensive and hard to titrate. I can't be nodding out at any given time. So, what you reckon I chose as the most 'logical and safe' solution? Straight to heroin, no fucking around.
I believe that drugs should be clean. At the start, SavageHenry was consistent. However, he fucked me, then I gave him another chance, and that almost cost me my life. Thankfully, my new gf found me, so that's 2 that have saved me now. She obviously knew I was ordering drugs, cos she was consuming them too. I never said it was H though, so had to lie to her so as not to scare her. Never sniffed or used SH again. Would only use the best, GentsChoice, Mirkov etc. I was only buying small amounts, as I only needed it for the pain. On a day 3 I had a little left and suffered withdrawls. After that I made rules and have stuck to them pretty rigidly.
The bottom line is, I was in a serious accident and in a lot of pain. I didn't wanna start taking illegal drugs, but I also didn't want a hunch at 40. I don't particularly like H for recreational, not smoking anyway. It's overrated and the tolerance rises up and the withdrawls are like death. However, unlike most other drugs, such as weed, I am able to get just to the point to ease the pain if I have a problem at work, yet still be completely lucid. Weed helps, but you get confused easily if you're under pressure. It's not something I'm proud of, but it's something I had to do, and it worked. I barely use it at all now. Buy a tiny bit when I run out for emergencies. I don't trust myself fully, but I can forget about an unopened .2.
Of course, that broke the seal a little. If the devil ain't so bad, what else isn't? I started investing my time in finding out. Tried Ket, love it. Meth, well, it works, but I like about 9hrs sleep if I can. Plus I only need it for particularly hard days. The first time I took speed was because I literally dozed off in a van while driving on the motorway. It worked but I hated the taste, so tried meth. Very productive. Honestly, if it wasn't for the DNM's, I don't know what I'd do. I'm too old to change careers, and I love my job. Everyone uses drugs these days. I think the Government should maybe ask why they use, rather than how or what.
And for the love of god, "it's" a medicine ffs, legalise it!
Which reminds me, back to the review. Excellent stealth. The LSD is special. The G13 is decent, but imo the LSD is well worth the extra £8. Only minor complaint is that postage was £8, while the materials cost £1/ pack very max. Are we paying for petrol or weed? It came recorded, but the stealth was above and beyond!
Pics or gtfo? I got some good one's I'll post a little later when I have a sec.
Tl;dr? Don't worry, neither did I ;-)
P.S. Stay safe BBMC. Hire a decent lawyer!
did anyone fucking read this?? who the fuck reads this?
if anyone read it, what is it about?